587: A Good Place to Start when You're Feeling Low and Slow
Today I had an interesting experience specifically because I seemed to face this resistance to my day. And I say that is interesting because yesterday the question was posed in a discussion about what is our purpose and reason for waking up in the morning. So I found it just fascinating that I would experience a day where I could have easily stayed in bed, stuck in an energy, feeling lethargic and apathetic, not really feeling like doing anything. Quite low and slow. without any reason for waking up.
So when I noticed this was my experience, despite having things I could do and sort of wanted to do, I resisted the heck out of it, so I asked myself, "what is my purpose today?" "Why did I get out of bed today?" And the question would go for every day... why do I get up in the mornings? What is my motivation? What is my reason for living? Sounds like a silly question to ask ourselves, but for me in my life, I see it as an absolute necessary question to ask myself because it requires me to become self-aware and self-honest about who I am and what we are doing with our life. For me, it supports in specifying and defining who I am within/as life - as clearly laying out for myself the reason for me.
So for this question being asked yesterday, and today's experience, I realize there is a lot of work still to be done in relation to it. What is my purpose? What is my reason for waking up? What is my reason for living? These are some questions I will answer and share as I explore in blogs to come, but for this one today I'd like to share how I supported myself out of the aimlessness I was living earlier.
What I could see is I didn't feel like doing much, yet there was a bunch of things to be done. And this is definitely not the first time I've faced such resistance to my day, though I can say such an experience hasn't come up much in the past year, I'm still quite familiar with the experience.
I saw there was a problem within this experience and something I didn't want to accept and allow of myself as I do only have this day today, and I want to live it fully. I asked myself how I could support myself to move out of this resistance and the first point I saw was where to start. I could start with cleaning and organizing my environment.
I considered it would be supportive to have a tidy space where things were put in their place, there was clear space around me... kind of like cleaning up the clutter outside of me to support in cleaning out the clutter inside of me. So I decided to clean the house. I decided to move myself to move things into an orderly fashion and what it did was support me to create a supportive, stable environment that I can then move freely within. For me, I find when my space is clean and clear, I have a clean and clear foundation/starting point to move from. There are no distractions in my environment, there is nothing staring at me saying "clean me" or things obviously not being directed. I can then focus on other things. So to me, it was crucial to have an environment that was conducive to how I wanted to experience myself internally, and within the other things I had to do... clean, clear, organized, and structured.
And so I cleaned, supporting myself to physically move out of the apathy, taking care of my environment as it takes care of me as providing shelter, warmth, safety, and comfort. That was the first step for me in moving out of the resistance and I could see it was a good place to start.
So I just wanted to share this point with anyone who may face a similar experience of resisting their day, "not feeling like doing anything", and overall just dragging your feet. Start with your environment... clean it up, get rid of the clutter, dust, vacuum, do the laundry. Get things moving, and organized in your physical environment and you may just find part of your internal environment becomes clean and clear too.
That's all for tonight... as mentioned, will be back to share more on my reason and purpose for waking up every day in blogs to come.
Thanks for walking with.
Artwork By: Desteni Artists
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