Day 38 - Split Myself into Two
Seems I did not save the last words I wrote – which were about a comment on youtbe that I reacted to. This person was speaking about how she was experiencing herself within addiction, and then suggesting ways she will support herself within this. I reacted to her words, I that I did not trust her. I thought she was actually playing with me – making fun of me and did not actually mean what she was saying. So taking this back to myself – I can see I don’t trust myself. Because what I projected onto her was that, secretly she had other intentions. She was sneaking something within her self that she was not showing me and just presenting something else to me, in a deicitful way. I can see how throughout my whole life, I have done this. I have always existed within this secret reality of my mind where my experience ‘in here’/within myself has been totally different from what I present to the rest of the world. – And the fear of being exposed as such has been quite an influence in my l...