Kristina's Journey to Life

A point I've noticed the last couple days or the last week is this reaction to 'all the points' that are coming up within me/my mind that I see I can investigate or work with in writing and self forgiveness and in that the reaction is 'where do I start' or "there is too many points" and I do not even then begin the process. So what I see is that I can direct myself to actually direct these points coming up within me as I've learned and created to organize myself - within a structure that is effective in working with each point, one at a time . The reaction I am having is unnecessary as I have more than enough time and the ability to organize myself in such a way where I can give attention and direction to each of the points. All it requires is my self willingness to actually direct the points. So instead of seeing all these points coming up within me and saying, "oh yes - I can investigate this point more..." and then not doing it an...

Here a point of reaction when being 'exposed' as in facing myself - in seeing how I was behaving,who I was in relation to others, what I was accepting and allowing and from what starting point - that of being self interest. I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to not receiving a reply back from another as the thoughts of “I fucked up, I know I fucked up and now I am embarrassed” I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself for the way I played out the relationship with another I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to experience feelings of embarrassment for being exposed, to myself, and to others about how I was existing within self interest in my communication with another I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear being exposed as a manipulator and now fear another hates me I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear how another perceives m...

A point of using my external reality and those within it as the motivation to do something, to move myself I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use relationships with others as motivation for self movement I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use my external world/reality as motivation for self movement I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to sit and wait for ‘something to happen’ in my external reality before I make the decision to move myself, to actually live I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe that if nothing is happening in my external reality, such as an interaction with another, then I do not require to move myself and then I end up just sitting around waiting for something to move me I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from self movement I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from my own sel...