Kristina's Journey to Life

Here the self corrective statements and commitment in relation to my previous blog post: When and as I see myself reacting toward another's words, expression or behavior in relation to feeling unworthy or not good enough, I stop and I breathe and I bring myself back to myself here, back to my body, back to where real worth exists as who I am as the physical, as life and so I breathe within seeing/realizing/understanding that the reaction is in separating myself from the relationship with me - the relationship I have within my own self worth and indicate I am not yet giving/living self worth as who I am here and so I commit myself to stop looking for worth outside of myself here, outside of the very breath I breathe and commit to realizing that real worth as who I am is defined and determined in every moment of breath, every thought, word, deed and as who I am in this life, how I live, what principles I stand by - those are the real determining factors of self worth and thus I com...

Here I am stopping and starting over and bringing myself back within the commitment and self agreement I once placed for myself yet gave up within the energies of hope and desire . The process of getting to know self, forgiving self and then actually, practically, physically changing self is not an easy process, yet it's one that I cannot deny nor ignore because I am always here with simply me. Everything that exists as me as thought , word and deed - is ME. There is nothing or no one outside of me to blame, to validate me, to confirm yay or nay to the ideas I hold about me, to give to me what I am looking for. I will never find an answer outside of the questions I ask myself. So I am starting over as the starting point from which I walk my Journey to life and my Process in general - getting back to the simple principles and tools that have brought me this far and I will trust within myself to apply and that will support me to continue walking this process of self honesty and...

Yesterday I was supported to see this point within myself that has always been here, yet never seen very clearly. And that is the point - seeing clearly, and within that trusting myself to stand as that what I see - and even more within that, to stand self directive in what I see.  What I have a tendency of doing is not trust myself, trusting another more than me and then asking permission if what I see/say/do is "ok". Within this, submitting myself to another, separating myself and actually limiting myself in saying "I cannot see this for myself, I do not trust myself enough, I am not good enough to see this, to direct this, to make a decision... will you do this for me?" And so within this, not pushing myself to stand up within myself, expecting others to do this for me. Which is actually manipulative as I am then accepting this within myself and changing myself in ways that another will feel they 'should' do this for me. Fortunately I have those ...