Kristina's Journey to Life

The other day I had a discussion with some women about femininity. It was a topic I was not initially comfortable with as I felt as if I didn't have a real point of reference on the subject... other than the fact that I am a woman. As we were moving through the discussion, I still felt like I 'didn't have the point' - like I couldn't really ground myself in our conversation because it was like this big ass question within me of 'what is femininity?' I can see some very surface programming within me of what I've defined as femininity, but I didn't have a new, fresh, grounded definition that I could really grab a hold of. What is femininity? One of the girls gave an outstanding example that really put it into context for me. She said masculinity is like planning a drive to a lake... they have the details of what time you'll leave, how long it will take to get there, what time you'll arrive. The structured, planning, already decided ro...

Here I talk about my experiences with diet, exercise and overall health as a well being... having walked a process of discovering the missing elements in understanding our relationships with our bodies, and what it takes to create a more wholesome, healthy life. What I share is what has supported me, and may be different from others - I encourage you to share your own ways of how you have supported yourself to create more wholesome health so as to support others with new ways of looking at and testing things out. Enjoy! The  Journey to Lifers Take Responsibility for what is HERE in/as this world, within AND without: Desteni DIP Lite Course  (FREE) DIP Pro Eqafe  (Self-Perfecting interviews, books, music, etc) For your Info: Destonian Wiki Equal Life Foundation SOUL (School of Ultimate Living)

I started a new job just a couple of months ago, which changed up my home-life schedule quite a bit. I am no longer working evenings, or weekends, and work more hours in a day. I am very pleased about the change, but with that, I had to change myself. I have been a long- time fan of to-do lists and while for the past couple of years of working evenings, I had long days on my hands and I could regularly get to a lot of things in one day. That has since changed, yet I still tried to do everything in one day. It's simply impossible. And while I understand prioritizing, and doing what is practically possible, I for a bit was refusing to let go of this 'need to do it all'. Though what I create from this is a constant failure experience, because I can't practically get to everything... something gets left uncrossed on my to-do list, and usually, it's the same thing every day. Then when the days off come around, I just want to 'run free' and do other th...

Here I am continuing from yesterday's blog where I opened up this point I see I am wanting to correct or adjust in my life. The point was balance and how throughout my life I have been very unbalanced, where I put all of myself into just one point in my life and do not pay much attention to anything else - and this is where I see my addictive personality come into play because it's like I consume myself within just one point and completely disregard what else is here, just as REALITY - like every thing that exists here within me and as me and around me - like my physical reality and all the things that allow one to live, practical reality points that require my direction and attention. Obviously it's different for some, whereas we will take on different points of responsibilities - yet I can see for myself where I have been walking quite a cool process with myself this last year in really zeroing in on 'how' I want to live, which is determined by ' who I am ...

Balance. This point came up for me today in looking at ways in which I live. I have never been a 'balanced' person in terms of having an equal amount of attention giving to more then one point, I have generally been to the extreme to one thing or another. Like over excited or blinded by one thing. So balance, this balance point for me is looking at what I give my attention to throughout my day - my daily responsibility and all the current points in my life, like work and school and desteni work and general living. I can see where my mind gives most of my attention to - usually diverting my attention away from being here, what is necessary in the moment, moving myself through each point effectively, allowing myself to actually move. Instead I have this tendency to zoom in on one thing in my life and let the rest fall the pieces. So when looking at this point today, I see it's about balance. Balancing myself as far as giving an equal amount of myself to all that is curr...

This point is in relation to how I had lived my life before, wherein I would replay the thoughts that "I'm not doing anything with my life - I am a loser, and a failure, someone, please give me direction!" Which is obviously within a negative context - yet no solutions were ever lived or changes made, I would just basically sit in my shit and complain and whine and moan about how I was a failure at life, allow myself to judge myself, yet never realize the simplistic solution to DO something about it. Now I seem to be living the polarity. I am busy these days, with school, and work and tutoring and my participation with desteni. I have taking on many responsibilities and commitment - and I am grateful to be doing what I am doing, as every moment of each task is the opportunity to in fact face myself and change the patterns I have seen myself live out. Yet - within this, I have accepted myself to go into the 'positive' side of it as, "Look at all the thin...