618: Death, Donald Trump, and Our Valuable Time (23 of 30)

I listened to an Eqafe Recording, Death Research - Time is the Present we Gift Ourselves, and in this 3-part recording, one of the first points mentioned really struck home to me. It was a point of this woman, who had died from Cancer, seeing how she spent what amounted to about 3 years of her life thinking and worrying about other people and what other people think. I could definitely relate to seeing how often my mind gives attention to other people - whether it's good or bad - it seems it's often thoughts about others, way more than about myself.

And that was the point she wanted to share and for us to understand - how much time we miss getting to know ourselves, understanding ourselves, because we are too pre-occupied with others. This also brought up the point of how much time and attention I see people giving to those they don't like, like politicians, celebrities, and public figures. I mean Donald Trump is such a prime example.

As much as people seem to despise him, man they sure do spend a lot of time talking about him. And from my perspective, it doesn't matter if what you are saying is in support or opposition to him - you are still giving him A LOT of your time and attention.

So I think it's important that we start questioning this nature of ours... why we spend so much time thinking about other people and what they are doing or not doing? Especially those we disagree with or plain and simple dislike? How much time do you think you will have spent thinking, speaking and acting out towards others in your life? 3 years? More?

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to spend any amount of time thinking and worrying about other people - what they are doing or not doing - as if that is a valuable way to spend my time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe thinking and talking about how much I dislike someone gives any sort of solution to what I think is a problem instead of bringing it back to myself and using the dis-like or worry in a more constructive way like asking myself, 'what about this person that I dislike the most do I do myself, or have I done in my life?'

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to spend precious moments of my ONE life I have on thinking and worry about other people - what they are doing, where they are going, what they aren't doing, who they are... not at all realizing the missing POINT here of this one life and that is to get to know and understand ME

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe there is any value to me thinking and talking about other people that I don't know or that I disagree with instead of realizing, good or bad, I'm giving them a lot of my time and attention and that is MY LIFE I'm giving to them

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize how much life I'm wasting in thinking and worrying and talking about others - especially those in the public arena that I disagree with

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to prefer to dwell in a problem by talking smack about others I disagree with and don't like, like Donald Trump, because in that dwelling on 'him as the problem', I don't have to take responsibility for the nature I see in him  that I've lived myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to prefer to blame than to take responsibility for myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to waste one moment of my life thinking and worrying about other people - especially those I dislike - instead of realizing I have MUCH more valuable things to do, and I should start with sorting out myself first

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think I must worry about other people and what they are doing as if I can somehow prevent them influencing my own life instead of realizing I am the main influencer and if I'm wasting my time worrying about others I'm not a good influence on myself nor others

When and as I see myself thinking, worrying, and talking about others - especially those I disagree with or dislike, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that those are valuable moments of my life and time I'm giving up to someone I apparently don't like and so instead I commit myself to stop myself in that moment and bring it back to myself and question myself, and look at myself, and ask myself who I am in this moment, who do I want to be in this moment, how have I lived similar to what I dislike about this person, and what can I do differently?

When and as I see myself thinking and believing talking smack about others in the public arena is a valuable way to spend my time, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand thatIi am delusional and that regardless of how I feel about others, my attention and energy given to them is me giving up my life, and moments of my life that could be better spent towards solutions and so I commit myself to change the way I look at people as making it constructive and empowering by asking 'how can I live differently and how can I be an example for others to live differently' and 'how can we create something different?'

I commit myself to stop wasting my life thinking and worrying about others

I commit myself to make me my focus in this life and giving myself the opportunity to get to know, understand and change me so that who I am is not one who wasted their time in life but rather took advantage of every moment by being a living example of what is possible in time and in life

I commit myself to support others to see how more valuable our time can be spent by bringing it back to self

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