Day 703 (6 of 30) - I Can Give More When They React

I noticed a specific point within myself today where I went into a reaction in relation to someone else having a reaction. 

Basically, I got mad that they seemed to be upset, inverting, obviously facing some stuff within themselves but I went ahead and made it personal to me as if they were doing something to me. 

What is more interesting is I know damn well I have been the one to go into a point wherein I shut down, react, get mad, blame my environment/reality/people around me... I have been the one that is busy processing some reactions within myself, facing some tough experiences internally and so not really able to express or participate in my reality as I normally do... so I've been there. I get it. I know what it's like.

And what would I like done unto me if I were in that situation? I would want understanding, space, compassion, support. I would NOT want someone to get mad at me, take my process personally, make it about them, and just add more layers to the points I am already working with. 

So a clear pattern I want to correct now. 

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to get mad at another for having reactions towards their environment, or others in their environment, or even to their own thoughts as if they are doing something to me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to make other people's reactions/experiences about me instead of seeing, realizing, understanding, and embodying the knowledge that it's NOT about me, whatever they are going through is about them and they for sure do not need me to add more layers to their experience by then getting upset with them

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that some harm is being done unto me when someone in my reality gets upset or shuts down, or is reacting within themselves instead of seeing, realizing, understanding, and embodying the knowledge that I am ALWAYS empowered to direct myself DESPITE what another is doing - I never need another to be any kind of way to be clear within myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to enslave myself to another by reacting to who they are, what they are going through or how they are processing their life

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, understand, and embody the knowledge that I have way more room within myself for compassion for what others are going through and facing and experiencing, and as someone who knows firsthand the struggles of living in survival... surely I can give more space, compassion, understanding, and love to those around me who are struggling

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in a state where I Judge before I love

I forgive myself that I have not yet accepted and allowed myself to exist in a default state of love and compassion first and foremost

I forgive myself that I have not yet allowed myself to see, realize, understand, and embody the knowledge that love, compassion, understanding, and unconditional support are going to be what creates a world best for all - as we will ALL Have to forgive each other to move onto something new

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame another for existing in such a way wherein I think/believe I am being affected instead of seeing, realizing, understanding, and embodying the knowledge that I hold all the power for how I feel, what I think and how I act and to suggest otherwise is absolutely deceptive and I am lying to myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to lie to myself with regard to who I am and who is responsible for what I think, feel, and do

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to enslave another to the responsibility for who I am in thought, word, and deed and not realize that when I do this, I am forever a slave

I forgive myself that I have not yet allowed myself to see, realize, understand, and embody the knowledge that I am able and capable to give another the opportunity to forgive, let go, realize and understand how empowered they actually are but I can't do that if I am limiting and diminishing myself and my own light/life force as the awareness of who I am here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit and diminish all life when/as I diminish/deny who I am here as fully and solely responsible for my thoughts, word, and deed

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist in a reaction towards another expecting them to NOT react when I am in a reaction myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to expect another to change without changing myself first

I forgive myself that I have not yet accepted and allowed myself to see, realize, understand, and embody the knowledge that literally no one has to change for me to change and to be the best version of myself and when I do that, all then have an opportunity to do that as well

I forgive myself that I have not yet allowed myself to be the visible living example that shows I can create a world best for all without anyone ever changing as it's done within/as my own directive will/principle of life in/as equality and oneness here

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to waste my precious life in space and time in waiting for another to be different instead of doing it for myself

When and as I see myself reacting/getting upset with another for reacting/being upset I stop and I breathe. 

I see, realize and understand that that was once me, and I know firsthand that experience and how best to support such a point is by giving more space, more compassion, more love, more understanding, and more awareness of what one actually goes through within themselves and to thus become a living support structure that anyone/all can lean on when there is a wobble within themselves

I commit myself to stopping all diminishment and denial of who I am and what I am capable of/as as being completely and absolutely empowered to be clear in all/every moment despite what others are going through/facing

I commit myself to stopping all blame towards another for who I am accepting and allowing within/as myself

I commit myself to stopping all expectations of another to change before I change

I commit myself to take all the responsibility for who I am and how I experience myself and give none of that to another as that simply enslaves us all

I commit myself to stand clear in any/all moments to be a clear living example of what is best for all

I commit myself to express more love and more compassion and more understanding as more space to living the principle of do unto another as I would have done unto me as it's the only principle that matters in fact

I commit myself to see, realize, understand, and embody the knowledge that for life to be truly free and what's best for all I will have to stand as the directive principle that is best for all that gives what is needed in each moment for each one to remember who they are and for me that is to give as I would like to receive

I commit myself to letting others react without me needing to react

I commit myself to seeing all beings, even those who react, as the innocent, pure being of light/life that are worthy, precious, and of the utmost value

I commit myself to live the truth of who I am and who all are in every moment as every breath.