168: Filling My Cup part 2
When and as I see myself judging myself for who I was in the past as one without direction, motivation and will to actual do things in my life, within this defining myself as not being fulfilled because I did not have 'things' to fill my day, I stop and I breathe and I bring myself back to myself here, as the moment of breath, as letting go of 'who I was' in order to be who I am here, as I see/realize/understand that to judge myself for who I was in the past is a way to abdicate the responsibility that i have to actually investigate who I was, to see why and how I was living this point of separation in seeking fulfillment separate from me here and to thus then find solutions as I see/realize/understand that to accept and experience and then judge it does nothing in terms of actually changing it and so I commit myself to investigate who I have been throughout my life through writing and self forgiveness, to get to the origin of myself as why I have accepted and allowed myself to live the life I have so that I may be able to find solutions as how to change practically and physically in this world
When and as I see myself defining my life as unfulfilled as not having responsibilities and 'things to do' in my world and reality - I stop and I breathe and I remind myself that doing things does not define a fulfilling life, but who I am within what I do or don't do is what defines a life fulfilled as I am either seeking it separate from me here or standing as self fulfillment as I see/realize/understand that each moment as I breathe, equal to and one with my physical body, I am fulfilling myself with/as life as the air I breathe and when I eat food, I am fulfilling myself and when I drink water I am fulfilling myself and so I commit myself to remain practical in what I live as how I define my words, realizing that words are me and to accept words to be something that I cannot live is to separate myself from the words and so I commit myself to redefining myself as the words I speak in bringing them here as this physical reality and a livable application that I can apply in each moment to actually become the living word
When and as I see myself attempting to search outside and separate from me here something that will fulfill me such as money, entertainment, sex or relationship - I stop and I breathe and I bring myself back to myself here, as the breath, equal to and one with/as my physical body and remain within the realization that I am life fulfilled as I fill my lungs with air as I see/realize/understand that to search for fulfillment outside of myself as my pursuit of happiness is to accept what this world is in how all are accepting this belief that fulfillment is found outside and separate from self and so I commit myself to turn inward as becoming self intimate with myself, in getting to know myself, and finding out why I feel unfulfilled when I can see that I am fulfilled when I am here, walking with/as/on this physical reality and so I commit myself to investigate myself within who I have allowed myself to be and live in finding solutions to who I am that no longer accepts and allows life to be separated from me here as searching for some external stimuli that I see and realize never lasts but must always be consumed in order to sustain the belief that fulfillment is a feeling - I commit myself to live the realization that life is fulfilled here as me and when I stand as self fulfilled, I no longer require an external point to fill me up, as I fill up my own cup and allow it to run over in all that I do as who I am as a reflection of what is possible in/as life
When and as I see myself attempting to fulfill myself as the pursuit of happiness in seeking my own self interest I stop and I breathe and I bring myself back here and back to the realization that all are able to be fulfilled, as I would like to be fulfilled and thus I see/realize/understand my responsibility within/as this world to give as I would like to receive, as to create a life support system that honors all with the ability to fulfill themselves, such as being able to provide themselves with food, clean water and shelter and the ability to 'do things' in this reality because they want to express or explore and not because they have to or believe it will fulfill them and so I commit myself to exposing how this current world system does not support life to be fulfilled and instead teaches one to follow the carrot on the stick in seeking something outside and separate from them here and not realizing all life is fulfilled in physical ways equally and thus it is our responsibility to honor this ability to live life fulfilled and so I commit myself to walking the process of understanding our reality as how our current systems operate in order to change them into one that supports all life to be fulfilled and honored in their right to do so
Will continue with the point I have opened up in the three previous blogs in posts to follow
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