07 November 2016

490: Tell-A-Vision and Move-Mes - 30 Days of Blogging: Day 24

I've identified a couple dimensions within myself as 'who I am' within watching television and movies, as shared in yesterday's blog, and so the following is the self-forgiveness as the taking responsibility for the who I am within watching television and movies for the first dimension - which is using movies and televisions to get my energy fix, and to tune out while I tune in to a show. To me this is not a healthy relationship as I am living the statement that I must 'tune out' of my life, instead of staying actively engaged within it, and also is using it as a source to generate emotions and feelings as energetic experience, thus fueling the addiction to energy. If you are reading along, read the following out loud:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within/as the starting point for watching television and movies to be strictly about entertaining myself with energy as emotional and feeling experiences

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to watch television without self-awareness, wherein I tune out as I tune it to what the tele is showing me as a vision to create an energetic experience from

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not slow down when watching television and notice myself generating emotions and feelings within me wherein I want to chase the experience as following a love story, wanting to create within me that which I see projected from the screen

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not use watching television constructively through being self-aware of any reactions I have while watching a show, investigating where the reaction is coming from, and even how each character or story line reveals a story within me as that which I'm accepting and allowing myself to live out as who I am

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to watch as many episodes as I can when I activate an energetic feeling within me that I want to continue to nourish, by going to the next episode looking to fulfill that energy such as seeing a couple getting together, or a certain outcome happen that I anticipate within me, or expect to as the desire to fulfill the energy within me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that television and movies are simply for my entertainment, wherein I can escape from myself, and my responsibility to who I am, and the relationships I've created within me towards myself, others and the world around me - within realizing that televisions and movies can reveal parts of myself I'm not yet aware of

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not take responsibility within who I am while watching television and movies such as when I watch something and allow myself to go on an energetic ride of emotions and feelings, exactly as being portrayed in the show or movie instead of being aware, and breathing while watching to ensure I do not get swept up into the experiences of it, and rather see objectively how I can bring it back to myself, that which I'm seeing, and how I respond to it

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an addiction to watching television and movies as the need for energy as emotions and feelings

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be moved by television and movies as the emotional and feeling experiences being portrayed on the screen, and accept that within myself, instead of being self-movement wherein I don't just follow what's being showed to me, but rather move myself, breath by breath, through breathing and being aware of who I am while watching television and movies

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge movies and television as a waste of time, instead of realizing it's about WHO I AM within watching television and movies - wherein the reasons I watch reveal the nature of myself, and so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to waste my time while watching television and movies and not observe objectively, within self-awareness, that which I'm seeing as it relates to me, and who I am within/as this world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not look deeper within the movies and television as seeing deeper dimensions that are existent that reveal so much about myself, and human nature - in this, not digging deeper within/as myself as in seeing my own nature, and thus humanity's nature

When and as I see myself watching television and movies within/as the starting point of wanting to 'check out' of my reality, and so of myself - I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that the nature of myself within such a starting point only creates a waste of time for myself, and a dishonesty as I'm wanting to 'get away' from my life/responsibilities, instead of remaining constant within who I am, as the responsibility I have to who I am in EVERY moment of breath. And so I commit myself to stop myself when I see I am moving from/as the starting point of wanting to escape within movies and televisions, and align it into a more constructive, self-support activity wherein I practice self-awareness, and self-reflection throughout what I'm watching. I commit myself as well to question what it is I am wanting to specifically escape from, and correct those points within me so that I'm not living the word escape, and instead embracing any challenges, or resistances that are in my life

When and as I see myself getting caught up in the emotions and feelings of the television shows or movies I'm watching, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and  understand that currently television and movies exist to keep people busy, and content within their lives, and does not support anyone to become more active and engaging withing their own self-reflection as who they are. And so I commit myself to not simply accept what I see as tel-a-vision and move-mes as following along to what the emotions and feelings as energetic experience portray on the screen for me to experience, and rather question it - reflect on what I can see within me and within humanity that is revealed within what I'm watching. I commit myself to become more objective when watching television and not a slave to what I'm seeing.

When and as I see myself wanting to watch more and more television to capture the experience I'm after as the emotional and feeling roller coast of the shows, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that my addiction to energy is manifested in my relationship to watching television and movies, and so I commit myself to slow myself and to dis-engage when I see myself chasing that energy. I see, realize, and understand that energy just creates an experience that doesn't last, and so isn't real and so instead of fooling myself I commit myself to remain constant within who I am, stable, and here - actively observing myself, and the show to use as a point of self-support to continue expanding in my process of change

I commit myself to use watching television and movies to my benefit as in getting to know more about myself

I commit myself to practice breathing while watching television and movies to practice self-awareness while watching





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