Kristina's Journey to Life

I recently shared that some words I was redefining and living for myself were Creator, Love, and Grace. Someone asked me to expand on how I live those words practically so I decided a blog would be the best place to do so. I'll start with Grace - this is a word that came up in a reading I recorded recently for my YouTube Channel - the point of Grace specifically in relation to a Swan and the feminine body. So for me, specifically at the moment, the word as a practical expression is in relation to my physical body.  As a Swan, I see them so graceful - gliding on water with such precision and elegance. There is such stillness yet fullness to them. Their necks are long and their movements so precise.  The actress Robin Wright is also another example of someone whose physical is the embodiment of Grace, as I see her - with her long neck and such a straight/upright, poised posture, she carries such length throughout her body, which creates what looks like spaciousness. Her movement...

The beautiful thing about having a reaction towards what someone else is doing is that is so CLEARLY shows you to yourself.  I had a reaction towards my partner in how I viewed him relating to our son who was experiencing a fever.  I reacted to how he was "babying" him, and acting like he couldn't do anything else except be by his side. To me, this was not serving our son as it was disempowering for him because my partner was victimizing him.  The truth is, whether he was doing that or not, I had a reaction to it. I got upset; I wanted to lash out, I wanted to push him to stop, I was the one judging.  So then, after some moments of reflecting, I could see I was, in fact, the one that has participated in such patterns.  When we got our dog Hazel almost 7 years ago, I was always seeing her from the perspective of "something is wrong with her," feeling sorry for her and seeing her in a disempowered way.  I've also participated with that pattern in relation to ...

I recorded a video today for my YouTube channel , and one of the points that came through was the true nature/expression of who we are. For those who have been following along long enough, you know what I will say, lol—our innocence, of course—but today's recording made the point clearer for me.  Simply put, looking at who each one is as they were born into this world- innocent, pure, perfect.  That is who we really are. There is no denying or getting around that. The being we are, that All are, when entering this world/reality, is innocent, pure, and perfect. The perfection of Life expressed.  To say it is anything less than that for the rest of its life is the lie.  I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as less than perfect, pure, and innocent I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define anyone else as less than perfect, pure, and innocent I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see mysel...

The most powerful and potent moment of my life was just after my son Phoenix was born. I was in the midst of my daily self-forgiveness application, which I had been walking for over a decade at that point.  I had noticed how during this time, after giving birth, my self-forgiveness felt more substantial, so much so I mentioned this to my partner. I felt more in my body, more present, and the points I was walking through with self-forgiveness seemed to be of more substance.  In this one particular moment/day I was applying self-forgiveness, I don't recall the specific point that I was opening up but I will never forget the line of self-forgiveness that was (one of) my most precious realizations.  The self-forgiveness was for thinking/believing I needed to be forgiven in the first place - within this - the realization that I was born innocent and subject to circumstances, belief systems, environments, past generations, and all the things that shaped and molded me into who I...

This past week I have been looking at the point of where my "real" responsibility starts.  I have spent the greater part of the last 13 years on social media "putting myself out there" to support myself and others in a process of self-realization. While a majority of it was for me, there was also this dimension/belief that I "should" do it as a point of supporting others. If I'm silent, I am selfish. Morality was for sure a driving force in my participation. I somewhat took this point on about 4 years ago when the starting point of me/my living changed - I allowed myself to explore myself in more areas outside of the main area of focus I had spent the most of my late 20's/30's.  The point that I realized about myself was how much I felt responsible for everything. Literally everything. Every.thing. I was the cause for all the suffering in the world, I was the cause for everyone's lostness, I was the cause for all the torment, greed, and evi...