23 October 2012

Day 83 - Separating myself from being the Cause/Source/Origin of Myself

In this post, I take a look at the experience of blaming another as the reason to why I am the way that I am. Wherein I live behaviors that I realize are not best for me, but instead of directing and thus taking responsibility, go into blaming another for myself. Which is obviously insane.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame another for the reason and being of myself, my nature

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame what I have seen within/from another as the reason/cause/source origin of why I am they way that I am and why I am who I am

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within this blaming of another as the reason/cause/source/origin of why I am and how I am the way that I am, abdicate my self responsibility to myself – to my life, to what I accept and what I allow within myself and within my life, how I live

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within this abdication of self responsibility for myself, for my thoughts/feelings/emotions/experiences within blaming another for the reason/cause/source/origin for why I am the way that I am, give away the power of myself to change – wherein the belief that another has created me, I give up the right to create myself, as I am implying that another created me – another is responsible for me and thus I am not able to change me – they are responsible for changing me

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to use and abuse another as blaming them for me being the way that I am, for the way that I live, as the reason/justification/excuse to not change myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge another for the living example in which I accepted within myself, instead of seeing that it does not support me and realize all are products of the sins of the father, and thus like me, another was giving a living example of ‘how to live’ and thus each are responsible for themselves in what they accept and allow as the living of who they are – so within this realizing that even though I saw how one lives in this world, that is clearly not best for all, it was still within my acceptance and allowance and not question the living example that makes me absolutely responsible for myself and my life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within blaming another for how they live as the reason as to why I live the way that I live, without stopping and breathing and questioning myself in such a moment wherein I am abdicating my self honesty and self responsibility to be the change I want to see in this world, as I realize obviously focusing on another and their way of living and judging them for it, does not change me or my life or how I live

I forgive myself that I Have accepted and allowed myself to lie to myself in accepting behaviors and patterns in my life that I see in another, that I judge in another, yet do not change within myself, and instead become dishonest with myself in such moments where I am projecting my attention unto another, instead of directing it back to myself – to see what it is I am accepting and allowing and thus responsible for changing in my life

I forgive myself that I Have not yet accepted and allowed myself to realize that no one will change until I change – within this – nothing will change until I change and even more – I can only change myself



When and as I see myself blaming/judging and thus abdicating my self responsibility to myself, to my life, to my patterns and behaviors, to my thoughts/feelings and emotions, unto another as being the cause/source/origin of why I am the way that I am, as the nature of myself – I stop and I breathe and I bring myself back to the breath as self honesty within taking self responsibility for myself as I see/realize/understand that no one outside of me accepted and allowed within me to be the way that I am – I am the absolute creator of myself and thus I am absolutely responsible for myself here, in this life and thus I commit myself to stop blaming/judging another as the cause/source/origin of the nature of ME, when I realize this is absolutely ludicrous and only an attempt to not have to change me

I commit myself to stop looking outside of myself as others and their life, and get self honest within myself and with me in my life

I commit myself to stop seeking ways to not have to change myself through blaming others, realizing this only perpetuates what’s already here – people pointing fingers and not willing to take a look at themselves

I commit myself to be/live/stand as self responsibility as directing myself back to myself to become self honest in seeing who I am, what I live and what I create as the life that I live, as a living example

I commit myself to stop blaming past generations for the reason as to why I am the way that I am, and realize that blaming does not provide any solutions – and thus I apply the solutions I have learned through walking the desteni I process – I commit myself to writing, to self forgiveness, self corrective application – to always bring myself back to the cause/source/origin of who I am which is me here

I commit myself to breathing – every moment I am able and aware of this point, to bring myself back to reality and out of the mind of blame and judgments and self abdication, to become self responsible in self awareness to always live in ways that are best for all/me


Featured Art Work By: Leon Perry, Kelly Posey and Jessica Arias