Kristina's Journey to Life

In walking the Desteni I Process, the tools we have available are breathing , writing , self forgiveness, self commitment statements and self corrective application. In this blog I'm going to share my perspective and experience in relation to the corrective application. So what does 'self-corrective application' mean? It means, that after one has done their self-investigative writing about a particular reaction or behavior or pattern that one continually lives out, and applies the self forgiveness as taking back the self-responsibility one has to this particular living acceptance of self, then one takes it into the corrective application. Meaning - one takes it into real time /real living application. Let's look at an example - in a recent blog titled, "When Desire is Driving," I wrote about this desire energy that I have noticed comes up in certain experiences in my life, wherein once I have decided upon something, whatever it may be, I will go into th...

Recently I was supported to see how much desire motivates me in specific aspects of my life . When I was shown this, although I have seen it specifically throughout this last year, I could not relate as from my perspective, I had been 'working on it' and was seeing the thought patterns and behavior that was coming from this desire energy. So when I heard this again, it was like a cool cross-reference that I was in fact working with the point that requires my attention, yet at the same time , it was like 'not a point' as something that I felt was coming up as much any more, so it was like I 'thought' I had a grip on it. Until it gripped me last night and found myself possessed by this desire energy. After the fact, I realized I had just a first hand look/experience into the extent of this desire energy and how I've allowed it in my life and how it in fact plays out not in just one aspect of my life, in which I was seeing it - but it in fact influences me i...

Here I am continuing with self-corrective statements in relation to the forgiveness written in the previous blog and in relation to a reaction I had towards a co-worker which was actually a gift as seeing me in the mirror as another. When and as I see myself reacting negatively to a co-worker as their words or voice tonality or how they look at me, I stop and I breathe and stabilize myself through breathing until I am here and clear and no longer participating as accepting the reaction within me as I see, realize and understand that to react to another is to project myself unto another and thus not actually seeing my co-worker, but seeing me through the eyes of the mind as a projection and so here I commit myself to not accept reactions within me towards another, and instead in that moment, bring it back to myself, as I bring myself back to me as breath, and realize, see and understand that there is a key for me to see here as the reaction to my co-worker as who I have been throug...

The other day at work I was having reactions to a co-worker. It was a negative reaction in perceiving him as ‘talking down’ to me and ‘belittling’ me and basically, feeling like he was questioning my common sense. I noticed that his tonality and the way he expressed his words triggered this reaction within me, and even the way he would look at me while he was talking, I interpreted as him challenging me as basically saying I am not worthy to be even speaking to him – to leave him alone and let him do his job. Now this could be in the context of because I am a ‘new employee’ - I am still aligning myself to the flow of the restaurant, and how my co-workers are in their working space – yet I can see the reason this reaction was triggered within me is simply because it’s a point I've participated/expressed in my own life, towards others. And in not taking responsibility for that, I am instead, here , projecting this unto to my co-worker. It’s like saying, in my life, I have ...

I've just finished watching the latest Desteni I Process Live Google Hangout ( watch here ), in where the participants were discussing the point of projection and how within this exists the most amazing gift we can give to ourselves, which is the ability to see who we really are, and of course from seeing for real, in self honesty, the ability we have to actually change and transform ourselves. This was a very cool discussion for me to see as it brought together some points I have been facing within myself/my life/my process. Last night, while in discussion with another, I asked them to pull an Osho tarot card for me, and the card was Maturity. I, in that moment, said I could not relate, except saying "I need to grow up." What I now see as the relevance of that card in what it was supporting me to see, and what I saw through watching the google hangout, is that I in fact am not allowing myself to mature. Here's why/how: Projecting unto another can easily be seen w...

Continuing on with the corrective/ commitment statements in relation to the previous blog - please read for context, and to assist and support yourself, you can read the following statements out loud. When and as I see myself picturing/imagining/projecting myself into a future, within my mind, of me 'failing' due to not managing my jobs effectively - I stop and I breathe and do not accept and allow myself to participate as I see, realize, and understand that to 'follow along' with this image as a future of me failing, leads to the consequence of back chats that perpetuate this initial reaction where I basically accepted this image as an idea and statement of who I am; trusted in this image of me failing and so I commit myself to no longer participate within images in my mind of who I can possibly be in some possible future and instead stick to the physical - stick to what is HERE, and what is real, which is my physical body, my physical environment, and what is d...