622: Programmed to Only Process Pictures (27 of 30)

I have throughout my life been an avid reader and one who resists reading - kind of swinging back and forth from one polarity to the other. Lately, I've been more resistant and in my attempts to get some reading in, it's like I just can't "pay attention" or stay engaged. I quickly disengage and go on to something 'easier' to process... to me, this is a consequence of this world and a consequence of my own acceptance and allowance.

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to read more

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to skim through articles and blogs and not take the time to slow down and read each word as a point of actual support for myself in slowing down and learning about something/someone else and in a way getting out of my own head/bubble

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not have the patience to read articles and blogs and to just instead skim through and not realize the self-compromise and self-sabotage this is as I am a) programming/conditioning myself to not have the attention span to read and b) not educating myself by reading new words and concepts and ideas that do actually expand my mind and perspective in a practical way

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the time it takes to actually read articles and blogs and instead to just glance or skim and to instead be more inclined to pictures which implies I am a product of this world that has dumbed itself down to the point where pictures are the only thing we can process instead of actual information as words

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to become a product of this world where I forgo reading for insta-pictures

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to be in AND of this world where I accept this experience of not wanting to read articles and blogs and to instead rather watch videos and see images instead of realizing how compromising this is to my self - where I am not creating a relationship with words, concepts and ideas and instead re-wiring my brain to only be able to process pictures and images and thus slowing down my capacity to critically think and consider

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to feel embarrassed for my lack of reading where I have a resistance to do it, and even though I will do some reading for a while - it's more in a starting point of self-judgment wherein eventually I fall back into a resistance because I never really understand the reason I resist reading, and how I have to practice develop the habit through consistent application that is not created in a polarity but rather as a common-sensical approach to how I can support myself to grow and expand

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear I'm too old to learn anything new in terms of how I am able to process information and think and believe my opportunity is gone and my intellect is what it is and there's no changing it instead of realizing I have the potential to change anything of myself with a little self-will, direction, and action - consistently

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize and see the consequences of not reading has on an individual

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not give myself the opportunity to change who I am as a product of this world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to hinder my ability to process and critically think about information because I refuse to create a habit within me of reading

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as dumb because I don't read a lot

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to wallow in self-pity and victimization wherein I define myself as a product of this world where reading is not a priority instead of seeing, realizing and understand there is a point here to empower myself to stand up and change wherein I can make the decision to apply myself consistently to practice and create the habit of reading wherein I am supporting myself with integrating words and information that will support me to more critically thinking about our world, the problems, and so the solutions

When and as I see myself resisting reading articles or blogs, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand this resistance is implying I am going against my program/conditioning as a product of this world where pictures and videos are the preferred source of consuming knowledge and so while the resistance is uncomfortable it is also a great opportunity and key to transforming myself and so I commit myself to create a habit of reading more where I can practice daily getting some reading in - whatever or however long it takes - even just 10 minutes daily accumulates and adds to a new habit and so I commit myself to create this new habit within me of willing to read

When and as I see myself defining myself as dumb because I don't read, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that this self-judgment does not serve me and only keeps me within a disempowered position of saying 'what's the point' in changing my habit of not reading to reading and so I commit myself to rather live self-empowerment by realizing I can change me and I know what it will take to create the physical change and so I commit myself to also create the physical change by daily reading

I commit myself to act in the interest of myself and my ability to process and critically think about words and information by daily reading

I commit myself to stop using the excuse and justification that I don't like to read or reading is boring or I don't have enough of an attention span to read and instead realize that is the state of the condition of my mind where through my physical choices and actions to NOT read and instead consume images and videos, I have changed the way my brain processes information and so I commit myself to re-wire and re-write the way my brain processes information by reading at least 10 minutes a day

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