596: It's About Time (1 of 30)

Today is Day 1 of 30 days of Self-Forgiveness. And it's about time.


I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not slow myself down in moments to create more time

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe I must rush through things in order to create more time instead of realizing if I stepped into my body and breathed with it, I would realize how slow time actually moves or rather how much time I actually have in a moment

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to retain the concept of time being slow, as when I was a child, and I did not have the information and knowledge stored within me as I do now from years of life in observation mode as my mind instead of remaining in my body, aware and present and physically in the moment as a child and so losing my ability to experience time in the slowness that it is

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to yet see, realize, and understand that time is not moving as how I actually perceive it but who I am in time as my relationship with time determines how I experience time

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to yet fully understand what it means to exist in time and as time and to know actually how time works as I see, realize, and understand that my perspeption has changed as I have aged in this life

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to slow time down in fear of death

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to want to slow down in order to make more life for myself instead of realizing that who I am in a moment of time determines the quality of life I have and live and so perhaps my focus should not be about slowing down time, but to rather be IN TIME and AS TIME

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to move through life wanting to quickly get on to other things when doing certain tasks - wanting to quickly skip past and through it and to get to the other side to what I think I'd rather be doing, instead of realizing I am willing time to move forward, to fast forward and so not actually walk, live, be, breathe HERE as time

I forgive myself that I have not yet accepted and allowed myself to fully embrace and merge with time as it's defined in/as/with a breath

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define time as a clock on a wall instead of realizing that is a construct of time created by man, and while it has its practical purpose, the REAL-TIME living is in and as and with the breath

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to yet realize that my body is an indicator of time and the time is always here as the body always breathes

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate myself from time as my breath

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to separate and define time as something outside/external from me that measures something that is not part of me or that is not within me but is some external force that I am moving in, but that does not exist in me

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to yet realize how I am time

I forgive myself that I have not yet accepted and allowed myself to define time as who I am

I forgive myself that I have not yet accepted and allowed myself to stop myself in/as time to not create the same relationships I have with time and to instead allow my concept of time to be that from which it was at the beginning of my time on earth... where time seemed to not move... where I was stopped in one place in time and one moment seemed to stretch into infinity and I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to within that - yearn for time to speed up instead of realizing the gift I had of time as a child

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not embrace the concept of time as being slow as it was as a child and want it to go quicker, and within that, want to be older because I believed THEN I would be living instead of realizing the LIFE I actually was as a child, that was PRESENT and AWARE of the moments of REAL-TIME

When and as I see myself wanting to slow down time as something separate from me here, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that part of this want is based in a fear of losing time... of facing death and so I commit myself to stop this fear of death and focus more on my moments of LIFE

When and I see myself wanting to define time as fast or slow, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that time is a construct that is determined by me and who I am in time, and not about the speed in which it is experienced and so I commit myself to slow myself down in time through walking in REAL-TIME which is with/in/as my breath... my very breathing is real time.

When and as I see myself wanting to rush through time to be done with what I'm doing and move on to the next thing, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that within this, I am not embracing me within/as time and instead judging which time is better than others and so I commit myself to realize that I do have a limited time on this year - there is no certainty about the time we have on this earth and so I commit myself to embrace, engage, explore, and participate fully with each moment of real-time that I have and practice it until I have perfected it


Art By: Marlen Vargas Del Razo


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