23 November 2016

505: Life beyond the Bars

Recently I was talking to someone I just met, who just got to town, and started working where I work. As we were getting to know each other, and talking about what we do outside of work, I mentioned I don't go out to the bars or clubs in town. She seemed quite startled, and asked, "What do you do then?"

This kind of gave me a chuckle inside because that is often something I reflect on - how my lifestyle might seem quite boring to a lot of people, especially because of the simple fact that I don't go out drinking or partying. That is such a huge part of people's lives, especially in their twenties, and even thirties.. the idea of not participating in such activities can seem like what else is left? I definitely had this experience when I was in my early twenties, and going out a couple times during the week... if I wasn't going out, I would often wonder what others were doing, and what I was missing out on. Almost like my life stopped on those nights where I wouldn't go out.

Yet what is most interesting is to see while I thought my life stopped when I wasn't going out, I can actually see how much less active my life was before I started walking the Desteni I Process - how much I just gave into the 'norms' of society as being 'what you do' without question. Since stopping drinking, and my other vices, I've become much more focused on self-development, and often find my days filled with more than enough things to do.

I can't even now imagine having the time to go out and just drink for 4 or 5 hours a night. Sure, I've enjoyed a couple nights here and there of dancing, or socializing at a bar with co-workers or friends, but my participation and focus is no more in that type of environment, and I can't imagine it being any other way.

I used to experience boredom a lot, or when I look at who I was and how I lived 7 years ago... I was quite in the routine of wake up, work, hang out with friends, go to sleep, repeat. There was nothing within my awareness of self-development as it is now... I am surprised to think how I wasn't more bored with myself. I mean yes, there were some aspects of self-development, but overall I was very much content with the movement of my life, which was making money to spend it out with others. My down time was spent watching TV or movies, not ever really thinking long term, or even short terms goals. I was quite complacent.

So a couple important points for tonight. Boredom is not really valid in that there is ALWAYS something to do, especially if you are willing to develop yourself and not simply accept life the way it is for so many. And there is MORE in this life than just drinking and partying, and watching TV or movies. There are many things we can do, each day, that supports in nurturing our utmost potential, and it starts with questioning who you are within what you do and seeing where you can expand beyond your own self-imposed limitation.

Life is not meant to be passed by, keeping ourselves busy with whatever until it's over - drinking our money, and life away. It's meant to be questioned, assessed, developed, changed, moved, and expansive. Don't settle on the norms, create your own norms that are best for you and everyone else around you. Live life beyond the bars.

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