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Showing posts from September, 2016

465: The Special Effects of Writing

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In the last couple months, I have been making it a point to write everyday, or at least every couple days. Writing has been a consistent resistance I've experienced throughout my process, and well frankly it was causing consequences within myself, and so in my life. How you ask? Well with writing, it's a point of reflecting on who I am within my day to day living - introspecting and asking questions about why I do what I do, or where the thoughts I think come from - better understanding myself and how I function, and ultimately it's about taking self-responsibility for who I am. I wasn't doing that. I was projecting a lot of blame, victimizing myself in relation to others and life circumstances, and essentially wallowing in self-pity. To me this was a consequence I was creating through not taking self-responsibility for myself through writing. So I decided to start, and like I said, it's something I've been consistently working on the past couple of month

464: People Will Talk

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I recently had an incident with another at work wherein it triggered some fears , and reactions within me towards the idea that she was 'talking bad' about me to the other co-workers. Basically imagining her explaining a situation she had with me to others, and painting me in a bad light - or 'making me look bad' essentially. What I realized within this was that my fear of her talking bad about me to others may in fact actually happen... after-all I do see the tendency of human behavior is to gossip, or talk about others behind their back. Especially if we have a moment with another where we have our own reactions towards them... we are very quick to go and tell others our story. Though to react to this is useless because I have no control over others. I only have control over who I am, and through time, the impression of me that is real will stand and so it's not up to me to try and get others to like me, or to see me in a certain way, and prevent them from