01 May 2016

454: The Golden Rule

Let's continue from the previous blog:

"It’s not really ‘them’ I am bothered by for not speaking direct to people, and instead talk behind their backs. It’s ME bothered by the fact that I cannot do that myself. And why? Because of fear… avoiding conflict, imagining harsh reactions that I may cower from. Fear of standing by my own insights, realization and understandings…."

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react negatively when hearing others talking about people who are not around/in the environment as a point of gossip

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame those that gossip/talk about others who are not around as being unfair and nasty because those they are talking about are not there to speak for themselves or address what is being said about them

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame those that speak about others as having nothing important or valuable to say, and so to within this, dismiss them as who they are, to simply write them all, to define them based on one moment of them speaking about others instead of realizing or rather understanding the WHY they do such things, and find solutions for myself in terms of how I can support to change such a moment

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within/as judgment when I hear others gossiping about people – to cast my judgments unto them, and to within that, see myself as superior/better than them

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself as better than others just because I perhaps understand the consequences of gossiping, and that it is not acceptable, and I should treat others the way I want to be treated, instead of realizing that in my defining myself as better than others is the exact same reason why I’m upset in the first place… because usually the gossiper is speaking from a point of superiority, and casting judgment onto those they are gossiping about and so in this… seeing I am doing the exact same thing unto others that they are doing to those that aren’t around

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to project myself unto others as in to blame and judge those that do something/take an action that I do not agree with, such as talking negatively about others when they are not around to defend themselves yet to do that myself towards those I am judging/blaming as speaking (in my mind) negatively about others, and not speaking directly to them so as to give them also an opportunity to defend themselves, or to share themselves in a way that perhaps promotes change/self-understanding, and responsibility

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to blame and judge the gossipers for not being direct in communicating to those they are talking about behind their backs… to define them as weak and cowardly for not being able to say to the face of the being they are talking about what they are willing to say about them to others, instead of realizing that I am existing within such the same point whereas I fear speaking directly to those that gossip in saying to them what they are doing is not cool and give an understanding to the behavior rather than just condemning them as bad people

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear speaking up and standing up for those that are not present to defend themselves when I hear people talking/gossiping about them when they are not around… as actually DOING what I would have done unto me, and treating others the way I would want to be treated, and so to not give such power to the gossipers as fearing how they will respond/react to me if I suggest they stop what they are doing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to fear conflict with others and so just create it within myself such as when I hear someone speaking in a way that is not supportive about another that is not around to speak their part – instead of saying something as in suggesting the one to stop, I rather go into myself/my mind and react negatively, going into conflict internally against the person, rather than physically speaking and directing the point to understanding and a solution

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed my own self-interest to get in the way of what is doing best for all as speaking to one who is gossiping and suggesting it is not supportive behavior and sharing the perspective of do unto another as you would have done unto yourself, but to rather react in fear, and coward within myself in fear of conflict and reactions from others and so to simply then stay quiet and within this, enable the behavior to continue

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to enable the behavior of gossiping about others through staying silent/not speaking directly and opening about such behavior being unacceptable and not within the principle of what is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to limit myself within how I express myself, or when I am faced with a point of expansion and growth, as stepping out of my comfort zone, when I hear others gossiping/speaking negatively about others when they are not around as suggesting to those doing the action to stop, or give opportunities to understand why the behavior is not acceptable

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as inferior to others as not wanting to speak directly to those that gossip that what they are doing/saying is not acceptable, and to fear directing the conversation back to themselves as the REAL source of judgments/blame/inferiority/superiority/insecurity/jealousy… supporting others to self-reflect rather than deflect in focusing on/judging/discussing other people and their lives

I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to live and thus express the importance of self-reflection as what really matters in this world… as the most valuable communication we can have is with/about ourselves in the nature of self-honesty… taking a real look as who we are in relation to EVERYTHING within ALL moments of our lives as the actual, living process of ‘man know thyself’

When and as I see myself reacting towards others as blaming/judgment/dismissing them as who they are when/as I hear/see them speaking about others, or gossiping about others, I stop and I breathe. I see, realize, and understand that my reaction to others speaking about others behind their backs, and not speaking to them directly is directly linked to who I am in such moments... it is in fact a reflection of myself within not willing to face/direct and speak to those I see speaking/gossiping about others and how it is not within what is best for all, and is just a deflection from what one actually experience in relation to themselves. I commit myself to see, realize, and understand the responsibility I have to live and express principles that are best for all, and that first starts with my responsibility to living in such a way I want/expect others to, and that is within principles that are best for all, that consider others as equal, to not judge, or blame, or dismiss but to rather understand, and forgive, and to be self-honest. And so I commit myself to change ME as the actual source of my conflict by stopping the fear of conflict within/as me as speaking up, and directly to those that participate in gossip when in my presence, and to share understandings that such behavior is not acceptable and can actually be changed.

I commit myself to stop blaming others for things I participate in as well

I commit myself to stop judging others for things I do as well

I commit myself to start with myself as the source from which change must and can only emerge

I commit myself to live in such a way wherein I become an example, and no longer need to fear what I express, as it becomes a natural expression of me based on who I am, how I live, and the principles in which I apply in my life

I commit myself to develop and practice living/practicing principles that are best for all so that others may see change, self-responsibility, integrity, and real love is possible



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