Last week I was placed into a position I did not expect, and in a way resisted for quite some time. Someone close to me was going through some problems and I was one of the main people in their life to 'pick up the slack' in a way - to step in and take responsibility for aspects of this person's life that they were no more able to do anything about as their situation left them immobile for the time being.
I started writing about this situation immediately and my experience within me and I saw this statement within me of "Why should I help?" Fueling this statement was another statement of, "they would never support me like this." And when facing this within myself through my writing, the realization hit me like a ton of bricks. I was existing in this statement within a point of spite - I deliberately did not want to assist this being simply because I didn't see them capable of supporting me in the same manner, or that they wouldn't, simply because of how I have seen them in the past. This to me was the epitome of the problem of our world. We are not willing to give to each other, because we see no self-interest in helping others; because we think no one will do for us what we are expected of or put into a position to do for others and because of this, we don't support each other.
After asking myself the question, "Why should I help," and seeing the dishonest nature of spite I was standing in within such a statement... an answer came up within me. The answer to, "why should I help?" And the answer was simple - because I am able to. Because I can.
Within this answer, I realized what it means to give unconditional. When I removed the spite, and the anger and the blame... I saw myself in a position of being able to support another and take on the responsibilities they were no longer able to. And my reason for doing it was simply because I could. Because I was able. Because I am here and because I no longer accept and allow myself to exist in spite, expecting something in return before I'm willing to do for others, and instead realizing that through walking my process of giving to myself, of Self-FOR.GIVE.NESS, I have moved myself to also be able to give to another.
So that is what I did. I stopped the spite, and I stepped up. Because I was needed and it was necessary and there was no good reason why I shouldn't, only the spite.
That is the only reason we do not change ourselves or our world, or the nature of who we are that constitutes our world - because we exist in spite in relation to each other. We blame each other for our mistakes, and use the past as a reason to not create something new, as a new movement and a new decision to be someone else, someone that gives and supports unconditionally to another as themselves.
That was also the principle I saw step forward within me - realizing that despite what I think the other would do or wouldn't do... I could see the simple point. If I were in their shoes, I would like someone to do this for me; to support and offer assistance to the best of their ability. The situation this person in my life found themselve in was not a pleasant situation... and to have someone be able to step up and take on their responsibilities relieved for a moment some of the pressure, and I would be grateful to have someone do the same for me.
I've heard a being say these words before that I could really see what he meant in, "All I ask is you give to others what I have given to you." And here was my opportunity. To live the example I have seen in another - to give to another simply because I am able to, because I can, because they were hear and needing it. It was strange to see such a starting point, of willing to help knowing and not wanting anything in return, because I have never experienced that before. I have never helped without it somehow serving myself. This was the first time I could see clearly the ability to give unconditionally to another simply because it's been given to me, and I have given myself the support and so I was able to give the support equally to another.
Featured Artwork By: Marlen Vargas Del Razo
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