30 May 2014

343: The Desteni of Living - My Declaration of Principle

I hereby commit myself to live the following principles:

1 - Realizing and living my utmost potential

2 - Living by the principle of what is best for all - guiding me in thought, word and deed to always in all ways direct problems to the best possible outcome for all

3 - Living by the principle of self honesty - to ensure I am pure in thoughts, word and deed: that my within and without is equal and one. Who I am within is who I am without and vice-versa

4 - Self Purification through Writing, Self Forgiveness and Self Application - the action of realizing I am responsible for my own thoughts, words and deeds, to forgive myself for transgressions and change myself to ensure I take responsibility for who, what and how I am and through this know that I can trust myself to always be honest with me and so others

5 - Living the principle of Self Responsibility - realizing only I am responsible for what I accept and allow inside of me, my relationships and my outside world and so with this responsibility: only I have the power and ability to change that which I see is compromising who I am, what I live and how this affects others

6 - Realizing that who I am in thoughts, word and deed affects not only myself - but others as well and so with Self Responsibility in thoughts, word and deed - I take responsibility for myself and so my relationships to be Self Aware in every moment and live in such a way that is best for me and so others as well

7 - Living the Principle of Self Awareness - to be aware, to see, to recognize my own thoughts and Mind, to be self honest to the extent where I can take responsibility for when I see my thoughts/Mind is not what is best for me/others and commit to immediately take responsibility and change for myself and so for others

 8 - With taking responsibility for myself, becoming aware of myself - take responsibility and become aware of others in my life, to assist and support them as I am assisting and supporting myself - to give as you would like to receive and do the extra bit every day to see where I can contribute to other's lives and so my own

9 - Living the principle of self trust - as I commit myself to remain constant in my living of self honesty, self responsibility and self awareness, I stand as an unbending trust that I always in all ways know who I am no matter what I face and that in this I know, as proven in the constancy of my living that I will always honor and stand by what is best for all and so best for me

10 - Making Love Visible - through me not accepting/allowing anything less than my utmost potential, I support those in my life to reach their utmost potential, to love them as I have shown love to myself by gifting to me my utmost potential, the best life/living experience and show others as I have shown myself what it means to Live

11 - No one can save you, save yourself - the realization that the tools and principles of Desteni is the guide, but I must walk the path myself. We are here to assist and support each other in this process of Consciousness to Awareness/LIFE and what it means to live - but the process itself, where you are alone with yourself in your own Mind: is walked alone

12 - Not waiting for anything or anyone to take responsibility for me and this world - but that I realize I have created who and how I am in this moment, therefore I have the responsibility to change who and how I am and so the realization that we as a collective created how and what this world is today and so it is the responsibility of the collective to change how and what this world is today

13 - Honoring the life in each person, animal - everything from the great to the small of earth, that we expand our awareness and responsibility to creating the best possible life for everyone and everything and so ourselves

14 - Relationships as Agreements: individuals coming together using agreements as a platform to one-on-one expand, grow and develop as individuals in life and living to support/assist each other unconditionally to reach their utmost potential where the agreement is a coming together of individuals understanding what it means to stand as equals and to stand as one

15 - Sex as Self Expression - where sex is an united expression between  individuals in honor, respect, consideration and regard of each other as equals, two physical bodies uniting in equality and oneness - a merging of two equals as one physically

16 - Realizing that by the virtue of me being in this world - my responsibility does not only extend to my own Mind/my own Life, but to the minds and lives of everything and everyone of this earth and so my commitment is to extend this awareness to all of humanity to work together and live together to make this world heaven on earth for ourselves and the generations to come

17 - I must in my thoughts, words and deeds - but most importantly in my living actions, become a living example for others in my world that is noticeable and visible when it comes to the potential of a person to change themselves and so change their world. So that more people can realize how we can change this world, by standing united in our self change within the principle of what is best for all to bring heaven to earth

18 - I am the change I want to see in me and my world - to bring heaven to earth is to bring into being, into living the LIVING PROOF of a PRACTICAL HEAVEN that can be seen and heard in our actions and words. We are the Living Heaven that must come into creation in this living world.

19 - Through purifying my thoughts, words and deeds - my inner becomes my outer, so I bring into creation me as heaven into earth, realizing it is not enough to 'see the change/be the change' - for change to become REAL it must be a constant, consistent living of me through the words I speak and the actions I live visible and noticeable to all in every moment of breath

20 - Realizing that my physical body is my temple - my physical body is the living flesh through which and in which I will bring into being and create/manifest heaven on earth as me in my thoughts, words and deeds and so honor, respect and regard - nurture and support my physical body as I would nurture and support me as equals: my body is me

21 - We are the change in ourselves and this world we have been waiting for: and so I commit to dedicate myself and my life for each one as all to realize this, as nothing will change if we don't change in all that we are, within and without

22 - The realization that for me to be able to change myself in thoughts, word and deed to the most effective living being that I can be and become - I first have to 'know thyself' and so commit myself to investigate, introspect and understand how I became who I am today, to prepare the road before me into self creation of a responsible, aware, self honesty and trustworthy person for myself and so for all

23 - The realization that for me to be able to contribute to change in this world - I have to get to 'know thyself' as this world and so commit myself to research, investigate and introspect the inner and outer workings of this world and align the systems of today to present and give the best possible life for all on Earth

In blogs to come, I will look specifically at each of these commitments of principled living to show how I've come to see/understand/realize how I have and can practically change and live them as Me.



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342: Seeing More of Me through Time

In continuing from yesterday's blog, with regards to the reaction I had to the time it would take me to get something done, where I reacted negatively to the idea of it taking me 50 days to complete an assignment. Some things for me to consider:

When looking at the 'natural world' as this physical reality, and the things that grow here 'naturally' - what I see is trees, and plants that take their sweet time to grow and develop and in that process, it is never as the process is 'complete' - it is simply here, doing it's thing, like a tree - converting the CO2 into oxygen, absorbing the sunlight, giving a home to a vastness of species, I mean it does what it does without an end result pushing it to do more in a quicker amount of time. And while I understand the perspective that one can become efficient in how they utilize time and maximize it to get things done - when one is moving to reach an end result to define oneself within an idea that 'quicker is better' - that is a point to re-consider and re-define so it's not about that. In this, the work, the process, the journey becomes the focus and not the time it takes to get something done.

One of the many things I have learned since walking my process and Journey to Life is that things in physical reality take SPACE and TIME to become manifested; to become created. Things are not instant, McDonald's styled results, where you get what you want in the fastest amount of time - no - physical reality moves slowly but surely, ensuring that what it is doing is specific and direct and to the point to ensure that what is creates stands the test of time. So that would be the point perhaps I am missing, the example from which to learn - creating myself to stand within the test of time. How long has this physical earth been here, moving itself, and creating itself to be what it is now? I mean in the context of time, it has taken advantage of every second it has, yet not in trying to 'get it done', it simply is here, expressing, doing, being, living. So why am I racing against time, seeing time as something I must defeat and become more than? I mean, one by one, step by step, things can get done, and that requires consistent physical application and movement, and so with regards to my lesson I had the initial reaction towards - it's purpose is not to support me how to move through time quicker, but to become aware of who I am in relation to words, how I live words throughout time, who I am as the words I live and the goal is not to go through it as fast as possible, but as consistent as possible, as disciplined as possible, as self-aware as possible - all the while developed to support me to get to know myself, understand how I've created myself to be who I am currently IN TIME, and how I am able to redefine myself, and so the words I live to be an expression that is my utmost potential.

So the self honesty point here is to see the ego in my actions - in how I was racing against myself, as time, to WIN, to be the best, to define myself as accomplished, as somehow achieving some kind of greatness, when all the while I was deceiving myself in not seeing the point, the purpose in which I am actually walking the specific process of redefining words in my current Agreement Course lesson.

What I can see is that this initial reaction to time is based on a past idea I accepted within myself that suggested 'faster is better'. One memory within this is when I was in elementary school and I was held back from recess in order to catch up on my reading. I don't recall the scenario leading up to this situation, yet I recall the experience of feeling 'behind' and I had to move quicker, as my reading was slow and so I was behind the rest of the kids and so ultimately, the time to play with everyone was the time I had to spend catching up on my reading.

Another dimension I can see within this is how, in looking at my life before I came across Desteni and started to walk my process, I had reactions to who I was within my life as 'wasting time'. I saw how much I did not push myself or move myself to do anything really - simply doing the bare minimum in terms of work and living, wherein I had no real motivation to do anything and simply accepted the state of contemplation in wondering 'what should I do' or 'what can I do', all within the idea of I was still 'finding my purpose.' So a lot of times I would find myself 'bored' and not doing anything, thinking there was nothing for me to do, as I was waiting for something to come into my life that directed me to do what was necessary for me in this life. The point being that I reacted in self-judgment towards who I was at that time in my life, once I realized that there is much to be done in this Life, and that boredom is an excuse to not take responsibility for what I participate and so create in this life - so I was essentially really hard on myself in judging myself for who I had been, and now seeing there was so much for me to do in terms of developing myself within practical skills in this world, and educating myself, and getting to know myself and our world systems as a whole.

So I can see how this reaction towards myself also has been sustaining this starting point of me moving through responsibilities or assignments or tasks that I have in wanting to get it done as fast as possible, almost to be able to say, "See - I am doing something - I am being active - I am getting things done." Yet - who am I saying this too? Why must I prove that I am doing anything to anyone or even myself? I am basically attempting to prove my self wrong in terms of how I defined myself IN TIME; trying to prove that my own reactions/judgments towards myself are not accurate, and so again - I am only competing/fighting myself.

Okay - so more opening up this point in seeing where this initial reaction to Time came from. Next blog - getting into the self forgiveness - see what else can be opened up.



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29 May 2014

341: Self Defined in Time

The other day I was discussing with someone how I was looking at/considering completing an assignment for my current Agreement Course lesson. The lesson is on redefining words and so I was looking at going through that process of one word a day. I found it to be practical for me to do a little bit each day in working with other SRA lessons and so considered it could work for this lesson as well.

When I considered this specific application of one word a day, I had a reaction to it in thinking, "there are 50 words I must do, that will be 50 days!" And the reaction was in the nature of negativity as "that is too long." I didn't like the idea of it taking 50 days for me to complete this lesson within thinking that's too long, that is taking too much time for one lesson and I must move faster with it, as to just get it done.

The person I was communicating about this with suggested that was a cool application of consistency, which is something I was not even looking at. To commit to one word a day and walk that for 50 days is quite a cool practice for me in continuing to develop the point of self-discipline, self-consistency, self-commitment, and of course self-direction. Yet I got stuck on the speed in which I would be getting it done.

So this tells me I still approach things from the starting point of 'needing to get it done' and so when the starting point is based within time, the real value as the actual work, and the actual application is being missed. I mean, wouldn't it be 'better' for something to be fully completed, within absolute awareness and perfect the first go, then to speed through it, missing things here and there and so not really fully ensuring that I am getting it right the first time - actually taking my TIME with it. Instead I am speeding through, 'needing to get it done', and so missing the journey, the actual process in which I am walking within the lesson that is the actual gift of learning about myself, how I've come to define words, and how I am able to redefine them into practical, physical living expressions of myself.

I can see this relationship towards time has played out in various ways and also suggests I haven't really slowed myself down to walk moment to moment, breath by breath, and instead am still tunneled vision into the end result; of just getting it done. I can see how it plays out in a lot of what I do - wherein I base 'who I am' as a self definition within the time it takes me to do something, rather than the actual work I am putting into it. So I've come to define getting something done 'fast' as somehow better than taking my time with it. I see then a consequence is not really embracing and engaging in what I am doing and am rather moving myself through it as quickly as possible to get it done and thus get to that point wherein I have a positive experience of 'it's done' - 'yay me, look what I've done in this amount of time.'

So a point to open up here and investigate further, which I will do in blogs to come.



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27 May 2014

340: Ranting and Raving on Validation

Validation.

This word has become a positive feedback mechanism wherein we are in this constant search for this illusive point.

The problem is we have separated ourselves from living the word validation - instead of it being an expression of who we are - as validating ourselves; accepting ourselves, substantiating ourselves within who we are and how we live, we instead turn to others, to our outside world and environment to give us this point of validation - to confirm to us that we are okay, we are acceptable, and we belong.

The consequence of this - a human being lacking any real courage to live for self, to do for self, to express for self, instead we are always looking for someone or something to give it to us. This is where Self ForGIVEness comes in. We must give to ourselves that which we seek from others - that is where the gift is, in seeing what we are looking for outside of ourselves and in turn, gifting it back to ourselves through embracing/giving/living it ourselves.

Take an example. When you look in the mirror, what are you seeing? Yourself? Or an image you want others to compliment or take note of? Did you put those clothes on today for you or for how you expect, want, desire others to see you? Is that outfit to validate an image of yourself you want others to see you as? Are you then expressing you or expressing an idea of yourself that you think will be most validated by the outside world?

This is just one way in my life in which I've seen I've sought after validation. In defining myself according to an image of myself, in how I look, I've attempted to gain the optimum feedback from others through how I dress, how my hair is done, how my make-up is done, etc. It is all within a starting point of wanting the best feedback, the most validation. The validation being a point of others validating, for me, an idea of myself that I am holding onto. If I do not get the feedback I expect or intended to get, then would come the possession of self judgment, fear, paranoia even in thinking, "what happened - why am I not being accepted? Why am I not being validated? Why don't people like me, what is wrong with me?" The problem is firstly we did not accept our real selves as the flesh of ourselves, as our physical body as how it exists and how it functions in sustaining our very life, instead we accepted/embraced an idea or image we have of ourselves that we then impose unto our physical body in attempting to mold it to that image we hold of ourselves within our minds that is most likely copied from the outside world; what we've come to see and define as attractive/beautiful/of value/acceptable and then secondly we expect that idea of ourselves that we then want to present to others/the outside world that we 'thought' would give us the best feedback, meaning - would give us the best feeling, the validation that "I am okay, I am accepted, and I belong." When it does not, our creation crumbles and our true intentions are revealed.

There are numerous times within my life wherein I see this word validation and how I have separated from myself from it/living as it in placing it within the hands of others. Wanting approval, wanting to fit in, wanted to be noticed - these are all forms of validation and when in this state of mind/being - one does not then live for or express FOR self. Instead we are constantly living for others, doing for others... well actually, ACTING out our charACTor that I think and believe will GIVE me the most validation from our outside world.

So what can we see from this? If we were to stop separating ourselves from the word validation in thinking and believing it exists outside of us, thinking others are the ones that can provide us with this feeling of security wherein we are validated, then we would start to realize we have never, ever, EVER lived for ourselves. We have never worn clothes simply because it's what I want to wear, because I find it comfortable, or because it expresses a part of me that I want to share with others - instead it is in a shifty starting point wherein we are attempting to quench our thirst for self interest - to be the best, to be the winner, to be better than others, to lift ourselves up, to get our little fix of positive energy. And all it takes is that one statement from another that suggests to us that we are doing something right - then all is well in the world and we feel fine about ourselves.

I can say this point of validation, in seeking it outside of me in the form of my relationships, my actions, my 'image' - I have always sought after a sense of validation in my 'outside world' without ever considering it can exist, or should I say, it does exist here within myself, in my expression, in who I am - it is here yet I have denied it, suppressed it, never bothered to develop it and instead sought after it from others.

Another perspective would be the abuse we are actually acting out within this - in expecting others to do or say something to us that suggest we made a right choice or we are doing the right thing or that we are acceptable and loved... we are using others to fulfill this part of ourselves that we could very well do for ourselves, and yet we don't. We expect it from others. How many times have you found yourself in a relationship wherein you expect a certain remark or statement from your partner that suggest they value you or admire you or that makes you feel good about what your wearing or saying or doing? And how many times have you gotten upset because they did not act in the way in which you expected? And so here the example of how we are in fact using each other for our own self interest, instead of being unconditional with each other; not needing anything, any word from them that would suggest somehow we are better because they said it; not using them for our own personal gain/power or sense of self.

We are more than capable of standing on our own two feet and thus more than capable of developing a self that does not require validation outside of ourselves. The moment you see yourself wanting, wishing, hoping, anticipating or expecting someone to say something about what you are doing that will give you a nice feeling about yourself - know that you are in a state of self interest and not only self abuse, but abuse of others as well.

Let us stop this constant need to use each other to validate our own ideas of ourselves. Because that's the thing - what we are wanting through validation is the acceptance that the self we portray outside of ourselves, in the face of others, is in fact a lie - we are deceiving ourselves because if we cannot stand as who we are, within all that we do, without the feedback as a form of positive reinforcement from others, then we are not being self honest. We are being dishonest with ourselves in accepting the idea that we must get others to sustain an idea of ourselves, that without it, would not stand.

My ranting and raving on the point of validation.

Another point - a consequence of validation... when one constantly seek validation as positive reinforcement outside of oneself in the words and behaviors of another, then we within that are making the statement that we are not good enough and we need another to tell us that we are. Continuing within this pattern eventually leads to an inherent fear that we will no longer get that validation from others. That what we are doing to ourselves in suggesting we are not good enough for ourselves and need others to validate us, we then project unto others and think and believe they too will see us as we are seeing ourselves; not good enough and then we are really fucked because we then cannot move ourselves to express because first, we are not accepting of ourselves, and now we project this unto others in thinking they will not accept us either and slowly but surely we isolate ourselves within our manifested FEAR of not being validated or accepted.

Redefine words in bringing/giving back to self the ability to Live/express Words as who you are - we can LIVE SELF-validation within our thoughts, words and deeds and essentially release ourselves from our own self-created enslavement to others. Check out DIP Lite to learn how to get to know yourself and stand on your own two feet, to no longer need a constant thumbs up and so develop the ability of real self-expression - me being me here in full awareness, without any hidden agenda or secret motive and instead, unconditional within who I am.



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21 May 2014

339: Blind Sweetness

After watching a documentary called "Big Sugar," and writing a blog about it - here are personal points for which I applied self forgiveness for:

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to purchase and consume sugar in the various forms it comes in from chocolate to breads and meats, without any awareness, consideration or understanding of how it got to the shelf in which I've picked it up from and instead simply see it there for me to purchase and consume and thus abdicate the responsibility I have to the rest of my world wherein fellow human beings must suffer dire conditions simply so that I am able to consume sugar

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that from this awareness of knowing where and how my sugar came to be on the shelf from which I can pick it up and buy it with my money, being that which beings must suffer in conditions that I would never want to be in myself, think that the solution to stopping this or to no longer supporting this is to simply stop buying and consuming sugar

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that money and its defined value within my life and thus the lives of everyone, is the reason many suffer for some to make a profit, such as in the sugar industry

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to be completely and absolutely aware of what exists within this reality, that I am equally a part of and thus supporting within its existence as it currently is, and thus I am equally responsible for ‘what is here’ and how things operate and even how products get into my home

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create a world in which I've completely separated myself from the reality that is here for ALL life on Earth, wherein I did not see, realize, or understand the history of sugar within humanity and how it is that it comes to be a product in which I can buy in the super market and so instead, am only aware of its effect and my cravings for sweetness

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that it is my responsibility to know and understand and thus be aware of all that is on earth in terms of how things come to be what they are and where they are and if I am not, yet still buying and purchasing products without knowing where and from what conditions they emerge from, then I am absolutely responsible for any suffering caused for the creation of my desire for something sweet

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to realize that while sugar at the moment is created from a reality that is harsh and unacceptable – it is a manifested consequence of the value system I as all have given within this world and thus the solution is to not simply stop buying the product and think somehow I am absolved from any responsibility but to instead realize I must change the very nature of the system and process from which it is created, wherein money is the motivator and reason and cause for putting some in a dire situation simply to cut costs and maximize profit – where some are enslaved into a situation wherein they have no choice but to take what they can get because at the end of the day, money is what is needed to survive and any means in which one can become self-sustained is sabotaged in order to keep the status quo where some benefit from the suffering of others

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to face the reality of what exists on earth, in all its forms and mechanisms and instead, submitted myself within the position of the happy and sedated consumer that does not question why I want what I want and so instead buy because I feel I must have it and so perpetuate what is here without any awareness of what is actually here and so continue the ignorance that exists for so many about the truth of our reality and how things come to be

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to take responsibility for who I am here, a human being that could have potentially been born into any other life/position on earth and thus could have been the one that is subject to the harshness of the reality we have created and so since I was not, since I am lucky enough to be where I am wherein I have the resources as money necessary and required to sustain my existence – I have a responsibility to ensure that any being could step into the life of any other being and thus still live a dignified life and so

I commit myself to educate myself and thus become aware of what is here as the world around me and understand how things come into my reality such as the existence of sugar and the hands it touches and the environment it moves through and the process it takes to get to the point wherein I can buy it with money, so that I can face the reality of my world as to then place myself within a position of power wherein I can make informed decisions about who I am and what I stand for and thus what I will accept and allow within this world from within the principle of ‘love thy neighbor as thy self’ and so I commit myself to working towards creating a world wherein all people could trade places with any other people and still exist in a dignified life, as that is what I would have done unto me and so I commit myself to no longer accept myself as being ignorant to this consumerism world and instead investigate all things and keep that which is good - I commit myself to become a part of the solution by continuing the efforts of the Equal Life Foundation and the Living Income Guaranteed



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15 May 2014

338: Emotions are Our Weakness - Become Relentless as the System

I notice that people (including myself), tend to get caught up in the emotional reactions around a particular situation or event that happens in one’s life. Say for instance something unexpected happens to you and you find there is an immediate reaction of thinking ‘what is going on’, ‘why is this happening’. We generally then want to fall into the emotional reactions we have around this particular event, especially when it involves other people in which we've had a volatile relationship with.

What I noticed within myself today when being around such a situation, where me and my family were faced and so dealing with a particular situation that required our direction and movement within the legal system to get information and find out options in which we have to get through a particular event – the tendency was to go into the recent past of how this situation developed and what caused it and what could have prevented it or going into future moments of how this could be changed or fixed, or what would happen if this person did this or that person would do that, or going into ideas about what was happening to other people involved in the situation.

What I found interesting about this is that here we are not dealing with actual, physical, practical reality – like what is right in front of us in terms of what is required of us to do in order to move ourselves through a particular situation or event to get to some kind of solution or resolution. We would just get caught up in the emotional reactions we had initially to the situation. There were phone calls to be made, more information to find out to be sure we were in the best possible position in terms of being informed about the situation wherein we could then make the best possible decision as to how to move forward. We had appointments to go to; things to get done. Basically there were things that were directly in front of us that we could give our attention and direction to, to focus on the present, what is here, what is required of us in this moment and our immediate future – yet more often then not we would get distracted by these other points that are not necessarily relevant to the situation as it was based in emotional reactions, points of blaming others for the situation we were in, projecting on future events of what possibly could happen – I mean one get lost in these wanderings of the mind and so obviously lose focus and become out of touch with practical, physical reality as what is here needing our attention and direction. I mean to make a phone call to find out more information does not require an emotional reaction – we do not have to get worked up or annoyed with the person on the phone – we simply are calling to get more information based on the information we already have and to essentially get us to the next point in which we can give direction to. I mean this movement – this is how we are able to effectively move ourselves within our system, in any aspect, where we become diligent in stopping the emotional reaction and become relentlessly steadfast as the system itself.

So it was a cool point for me to see within myself today, when the people I was with were getting caught up in what has been going on and going into tangents about what could possibly happen or reacting or judging what this person said or what if this were to play out, and seeing myself bringing not only myself, but others back to the task at hand. We cannot know what will happen unless we move ourselves to make things happen, to do whatever it takes to get things done and to not get worked up or overwhelmed by our emotional reactions to any situation. The system we have in our world, such as the legal system, does not deal with emotions. It does not care how you feel or what you would like – it is quite specific in how it exists, following strict rules and guidelines one must essentially walk through, point by point, to reach an outcome that could potentially be best.

That is a point I saw directly today – how uncaring the system is in terms of human's emotions and feelings – it deals strictly with information, facts, rules, guidelines, policy and law. It is very cut and dry, to the point. I mean the overall process might seem over-complicated and unnecessary at times – yet it is what we have here currently in place that, at this stage, in unwavering and stands firm in how it exists. And so we must become the same – equal to and one with how the system currently exists, just as the legal or judicial system. To the point, point by point, dealing with each stage without any emotional reaction but instead working with what is here and keeping at every angle possible to find a solution. Perhaps this is why so many feel threatened or even inferior to such a world system as the law  or judicial system – is because the moment we have an emotional reaction, we crumble, we diminish and dis-empower ourselves and feel its too much and we should just give up – it’s useless and so we do and the system remains standing where and how it is. If only we were to change ourselves to express such a point within ourselves – unwavering, standing and steadfast within who we are and in how we move ourselves.

So cool to have such a up close and personal look inside some areas of our legal and judicial system and see how really, emotions are our weakness. We cannot possibly move ourselves within any system of this world when we allow emotions to take us over and distract us from the process of physically walking in this world, what is here in front of us, that we can give direction to and move through.

Investigate the free DIP lite course that assist and support oneself to stop the emotional reactions we allow to distract us from what physically matters in this world and that we let get in our way from finding potential solutions in all aspects of life and living in our world - through becoming relentless as our world system itself - unwavering, specific, direct, to the point and constantly moving in order to produce results that can ultimate change who we are and where we currently stand as what currently exists.





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14 May 2014

337: Wait for it... Wait for it... Where is it?

Pardon my absence from the online blogging - for those that read my blog and do not know, I was busy finishing up with my last semester at my current college. I decided, with the course-load that I had, to give my full attention to my studies and so the time I had available I have been giving to strictly work and school.
I have just finished my last final and in the last week, as I've been slowly finishing up everything for each class, I have been in an anticipation mode of this great release from anxiety - like waiting for this weight to come off my shoulders and to be able to breathe a big sigh of relief.

It didn't come and hasn't come. And while I am now actually finished, completely - I still experience myself the same. The cool point within this is to see and realize that the school work is not the 'cause' of my stressed experience, of feeling like there was so much to do with so little time - and that for me to expect this relief feeling to come after the semester, reveals how I was not in fact taking responsibility for myself within my actual experience, but that I was in abdicating my responsibility and in essence, the power of myself to relax, take a breath, and walk steady and stable through all the school work. In the end, I was wanting the end of the semester to cause this relief within myself.

It is cool because now I can see that and take responsibility. I can see that I in fact was stressing myself out, and I am in fact the one that can relax. I had created a reaction towards my courses and thus created the negative experience for myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within points of anticipation and expectation of the end of the semester and thus the end of my studies to bring an experience of relief and release from the stress I was accepting and allowing within myself from and through how I accepted and allowed myself to experience myself in relation to my school work - which was stress.

So here, the polarity play out - school work/this semester being defined as 'tough' and 'too much' and 'heavy' and thus overall a negative experience. And so what do I do - look for the positive. The 'end', the relief, the heaviness to be lifted. Obviously that cannot happen when it's being created through and as myself.

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an unpleasant, negative experience within myself in relation to this semester/to my school work and to within this, desire the positive experience of being released from the heaviness I accepted as the negative experience towards my studies and so waiting and anticipating for that moment to come as the end of the semester

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to not see and realize that within anticipating or expecting a positive feeling as a weight being lifted off my shoulders and being able to sigh with relief, that I was in fact creating that from a starting point of reacting negatively to my semester/school work and to within this, not question my experience, simply accept it as 'how it is' and just wait and hope and look forward to that moment when it would all be over

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to take responsibility for the experience of myself and thus not exist within hope or waiting or anticipation or expectation of some better feeling to come over me by something outside of me happening, such as the semester ending, but to instead, investigate myself within who I am in relation to ALL things within myself and within my reality - and thus be able to direct myself more effectively as not waiting and hoping for things to change me and how I experience myself, but to instead be the change as myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to not having a change in my experience since the ending of my semester, within expecting it to cause a relief for myself without seeing and realizing that I create who I am and thus how I experience myself and even how I express myself as my experience, in every moment and so it's not 'up to' something outside of me to move me or to change how I experience myself - this reveals an acceptance of powerlessness, or enslavement even wherein I am wanting something or someone to soothe my experience, thinking and believing I cannot do that myself

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think 'now I have to figure out what this experience is' as like a resistance to self investigation, which I see is a point that I have often had a resistance to, digging in deep within myself to see what is actually here and the actual source of why I feel the way that I do - which at the moment is still this slight vibration of anxiety and heaviness as if there is something else I must do, that i need to keep moving and get something done - when in reality, I am able to stop, breathe - let go of the semester I have just completed and thus give to myself a moment as being relief

I forgive myself that I have not accepted and allowed myself to see and realize the compromise I was accepting of myself when having a negative reaction to my school work/semester and the positive reaction of wanting a big relief when it was over as not being clear about who I am within my studies/school work and thus able to more effectively direct myself within that which I was doing, wherein I am not allowing a point of being forced or dragged through it all, creating like a force against it and instead moving myself as my school work/semester, being able to learn about the material, and myself without some emotional influence fogging my overall experience

When and as I see myself reacting negatively towards things I do within my life, I stop and I breathe and bring myself out of the reaction and instead investigate why I am reacting, forgive the reaction and thus give myself direction in terms of how to approach that which I am doing which will assist and support me to get the most out of that which I am doing/applying/learning and so no longer compromising myself through the influence of a reaction I in fact accept and allow within myself and so here, I commit myself to no longer simply accepting any negative reaction towards that which I do in my life and instead clear myself from such a reaction to be able to see and direct myself within clarity

When and as I see myself within a point of expectation or anticipation of some relief or experience of letting go - I stop and I breathe and bring myself back to me, here, as my body, as my breathing and within the realization that I am here and thus I am able to relax and become stable within myself without needing or requiring something to happen outside of me to create that for me as I see, realize and understand that i am in fact responsible for how i experience myself, whether it's a positive experience or a negative experience or a neutral experience, I am always making a decision within myself about 'who I am' in relation to all things within/as this existence and so it is my responsibility to ensure I am clear and stable in relation to 'what is here' to be able to effectively support myself to be directive in that which I do and live and express and thus here I commit myself to take responsibility for myself in all moments, for how I experience myself, the thoughts that I Have, the words that I speak, the action I live out - to always push myself to become self-aware of what I am accepting and allowing and to ensure that I can stand by me/who I am in every moment within self honesty and self responsibility

I commit myself to no longer accept myself within a powerless position wherein I think and believe something outside of me is the one to change  how I experience myself - I commit myself to be the one that changes me

I commit myself to no longer exist within hope and wait for something to happen that will give to me a feeling of relief in relation to what I've done and created within myself in terms of how I experience myself within all that I do

I commit myself to investigate myself in relation to all that is here to clear out any influence of negative emotions or positive feelings that is so limited in the context of life and living and allows one to get lost in the energies instead of being here, breathing, moving, directing and thus learning about myself and my world





Featured Artwork by: Desteni Artists

The Journey to Lifers

Equal Life Foundation

Living Income Guaranteed 

Take Responsibility for what is HERE as this world, within AND without:
Desteni
DIP Lite Course (FREE)
DIP Pro
Eqafe (Self Perfecting interviews, books, music, etc)

For your Info:
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