This was a very cool discussion for me to see as it brought together some points I have been facing within myself/my life/my process. Last night, while in discussion with another, I asked them to pull an Osho tarot card for me, and the card was Maturity. I, in that moment, said I could not relate, except saying "I need to grow up." What I now see as the relevance of that card in what it was supporting me to see, and what I saw through watching the google hangout, is that I in fact am not allowing myself to mature. Here's why/how:
Projecting unto another can easily be seen when you find yourself saying, "She is doing this.... He did that... They are doing this...." anything that exists as a statement within myself as thoughts or through me actually physically speaking words and contains the point of "THEY, HE, SHE" and is followed by something that is being done to ME that includes a positive feeling or a negative emotion is an act of projection. So what is happening is I am projecting myself unto THEM in a form of blame or judgment, or admiration or attraction, and in that, reacting to what THEY are doing.
I have been well aware of what a projection is, or projecting myself unto others, yet I have not fully allowed myself to utilize this knowledge/information in my own process of getting to know myself and ultimately taking self responsibility for myself. I allow projections to exists as they do, and so within that, not changing, and so remaining the same - essentially stuck in the same self-definition wherein at its roots, resonates a state of victimization and blame, which ultimately is an act of self-separation.
It's self-separation because in saying 'they did this to me', or 'she does this to me', or 'god, I can't stand this about THAT person', I am not taking responsibility for the realization that my reaction towards/about another person is actually about ME, and so I am splitting myself within my mind, into a projection that I then place unto another person, saying "IT'S THEM." And in that, I do not have to put myself back together again, as bringing that point back to myself, seeing how/where/when I live this as myself in my own life and through my relationships.
I still see a lot of reaction towards my family, my co-workers, my partner, other people in my environment and so this shows me that I am not growing/maturing in my process because I have not taken responsibility for the projections I accept and allow within myself. I mean I cannot say that the relationships with my family or friends has changed to a point where there is no conflict within me in relation to them, where there is an actual growing/maturity happening - in fact I see a pattern of it getting worse, where I sink further and further into these reactions, which are basically just projections towards other people/my world, and so in that fuel this want to cut ties with people in blaming 'who they are' and 'how they exist', and all the while not seeing/realize/understanding and thus UTILIZING... actually APPLYING the gift I have of what I see in others as the projections of myself.
It's so easy to stay in the perception that 'it's their fault, and they did this to me, and they are the ones with the problem, and THEY are the one's that need to CHANGE... I am just fine the way I am, I have done nothing wrong, I am innocent and even a victim to their evilness." lol - really, what we are in this accepting and allowing is our own deliberate statement of our-self that says, "I'm not going to Change because THEY are not Changing.. it's THEIR problem, THEY are the ones fucked up." And so in that, I stay the same, because the point that is fueling my relationship to these points/people in my environment originate from WITHIN ME. No one can make me feel anything, no one can cause me to react with negativity - it is in all ways, always ME. Even if one can cause me to feel bad or have a reaction, it is still ME accepting and allowing them to have that power.
Simply put - You are my Mirror and I am yours.
So time to clean up this mess, because as I've heard before, nothing will change unless I change, and the more I accept and allow myself to react to other people (myself) and to this world (myself), the longer I am waiting in walking the process it will take to stop and change what is here as the collective wHOLE as Humanity. I am the missing piece, as the one responsible for my part in this world. And so I must stand up and become a living example for myself and others as to what it will take to change our nature as the process of re-aligning ourselves into principles that are best for all. I mean that would be to live maturity as who I am, actually expanding myself in no longer limiting myself within projecting myself unto others in not seeing it's ME.
Time to grow up. Time to allow growth. Time to stand self-responsible in all ways as the only way in which we can change the current direction we are heading on Earth.
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