14 June 2013

199: Starting Point for NOT Creating a Blog

Continuing here from the original blog I started in this series, Day 197: The Starting Point as Moment of Creation.

I am looking through this blog and addressing each point I see requires alignment with self forgiveness. I started this process in yesterday's blog, Day 198: Starting Point for Creating a Blog.

I am going to jump ahead in the original blog with the point of, "as even in consideration of writing a blog about the 'ethics experience' I have been having - within looking at that, I went into self judgments as not being 'clear' on what I was seeing, and from that starting point - made the decision to NOT write a blog. Within the the starting point that "I am not good enough to take on such a point in relation to ethics - it's too intellectual - it's too vast"

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within the starting point of self judgment for the reason/decision to NOT write a blog

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to exist within self judgments of myself in relation to ethics as a topic/points to open within myself in a blog

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to judge myself as 'not intellectual' enough in relation to writing a blog about ethics - instead of realizing that the level of one's intelligence really has nothing to do with one's capabilities of growth and prove that I have only inferiorized myself within defining myself as 'not intellectual enough' as seeing one being 'intellectual' as greater than me and so I forgive myself that I Have accepted and allowed myself to see myself as less then one who I would define as 'intellectual' as one being able to dissect and deconstruct ethics as it currently exists within our world

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give up before I begin in relation to writing about, opening up, understanding and getting to know ethics as a study that currently exists within our world and even plays a role to a certain extent in how policy and politics move and so I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to get to know 'what is here' as our current world system through the belief and self judgment that I am not 'intellectual' enough to understand

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see ethics as a study and philosophy from which some of our current world systems function and move - as being more than me, more than my ability to see/realize/understand

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe and think that I am not capable of writing about ethics within my blog and from this self definition - of not being 'intellectual' or the subject being too vast, move from this starting point to not make a blog and so within this accepting myself as a limitation, as not understanding, as a slave essentially as I am saying 'this thing/ethics is more than me, I can never understand thus I shall not even 'go there'' and so I forgive myself that I have allowed myself to enslave myself to my own self created limitation, instead of realizing that all it requires is my willingness and self direction to research, learn and understand what is here and with the principles in which I am able to apply within myself and in the education process - actually see 'what is here' as ethics within common sense, thus redefining it/seeing it within actual physical reality as practical solutions that can be applied as what is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to think and believe that because I was not 'clear' in what I was experiencing in relation to my ethics class - as this 'vastness of blankness' - think and believe and actually accept that that experience was real and thus I must accept it and not question nor challenge it and thus forever limit myself to my own self created experiences, instead of investigating within myself, with/through writing, to see what it is I am not 'clear' on and find ways to become crystal clear in the study, to actually be able to stand equal to it and thus direct it, as I direct myself, within common sense perspectives that can be used/applied into practical reality living

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define myself and my self worth or self value according to the experience I have towards/in relation to ethics as a subject and to within this, define myself as 'not good enough' to understand the subject in all it's forms and so within this, accept this as the starting point for not even attempting or trying to investigate it, get to know it, understand it and align it into the context of practical physical reality as what is best for all

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to see and define ethics as a subject as being 'too vast' as being 'too much' to know and understand and so within this, feel like "I can never understand this, I am not good enough/intellectual enough' to understand this instead of realizing that I am simple reacting/accepting such an idea according to my own perception - how I see myself in relation to ethics as a subject, and so it's not 'ethics' that is 'too vast' - it is me within my own self created limitation of what I am or am not capable of and so I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to react to my own perception or self definition of who I am in relation to ethics, define it as more than me and then accept this through/as reacting to it and then allow this to be my starting point for not 'taking it on' within my blog

I forgive myself that I Have accepted and allowed myself to define self value and self worth according to one's level of intelligence

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to define intelligence in separation of who I am here and place more value on the idea of 'what it means to be intelligent' instead of common sense as what is best for all in practical, physical reality

I forgive myself that i have accepted and allowed myself to define myself and others according to their level of intelligence, instead of realizing that none are equal in their education process because of our current accepted systems of inequality, where according to the money you have, defines your ability to be educated and thus intelligent in this world and so I forgive myself that I have not allowed myself to realize that intelligence does not define who a being is, but is a tool to be used to get to know what we have created in/as our world and how we are able to change/transform it into a system that is best for all - where all are equal in their ability and support to become education, to become intelligent, to be able to live and express and get to know themselves and our world equally - all with the ability to grow and expand

When and as I see myself defining myself according to 'intelligence' and seeing myself as inferior or less than or not good enough to investigate, research or get to know a certain study, such as ethics, and allow this to be my starting point as a decision I make to do it or not, I stop and I breathe and I bring myself back to myself, back to the point of clearing my starting point in no longer accepting and allowing myself to be a slave to my own self created definition as limitation that I believe determine what I am capable of in this world as getting to know what is 'here' as our world; how it functions, how it operate, what sustains it such as the philosophies and principles of ethics within seeing/realizing/understanding that until I stand equal to such a study or subject, as being crystal clear in it's functionality and influence in our world, I will be forever enslaved to it and so I commit myself to stand equal to ethics as study/subject through allowing myself to investigate, research, dissect and deconstruct it to be able to see it within common sense physical reality context, as what is best for all, seeing how it can be redefined into a livable solution for all and no longer something that some might fear in defining themselves as 'less than it' - instead I commit myself to let go of my ideas of myself as being 'intellectual' or not and instead realize that within willingness and self direction and the principles of self honesty and common sense as what is best for all, I actually have the ability to see, grow, expand in my understanding about what is here as our world and so I commit myself to walk myself in my education process within the principled starting point of 'what is necessary to be done' in terms of getting to know our world, it's systems and how it effect the lives of all, to thus be able to change/transform it into a system of life support - where all are able to exist equally within the ability to grow, learn, express and LIVE


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