30 October 2012

Day 85 - The Positive and Negative experiences of the Postponement Character

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, when having accumulated things to take care of, in moments of not pushing through a resistance, and thus allowed myself to put it off for another moment/later time go into the character of “I will get ALL of this done on this day” wherein I go into my mind and make a list of all the things I will be able to do on a more suitable day where I am not having to run around the city to work or school and thus believe I will then get all the stuff I have accumulated done, and within this creating an energetic experience of myself of “feeling good” wherein I give myself approval for telling myself I will do all this stuff and then feel good about the idea of doing all this stuff – when in reality I have not physically lived it and thus proving that the mental reality is an illusion that has no impact on physical reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an energetic experience of positivity within myself when I tell myself I will do all the things I have put off for a later time, instead of investigating the game I am playing with myself, wherein I do not live the commitments I have made, and instead feed off of the energy I create in the mind with the illusion reality that I will do all these things

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to validate the illusionary reality of the mind wherein I think and believe that I will be able to do all the things I have put off for a later moment/time within feelings of ‘being good’, wherein I do not question the reason as to why I am in the situation of having to get done things I Have put off and so investigating the postponement character wherein I will tell myself I have more time later to do something that is currently in my reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, when believing the voices as thoughts in my head that I tell myself I will do all the things I have put off for later times/moments, and then not do them, allow myself to go into the opposite polarity that was expected, intended within myself of feeling shitty and then judge myself for not doing what I told myself I would do – instead of stopping myself before this whole polarity playout could even begin – by not accepting and allowing myself to give into to the postponement character that I participated within, telling myself I can ‘do this later’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, in the moment of facing a resistance, accept the thoughts within my mind such as, “I’m too tired to do this, it’s too late, I will do this tomorrow… I have more time on this other day, I will get it all done”, instead of realizing that this is deliberate self sabotage to not be responsible for myself and the commitments I made and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow my thoughts as the postponement character direct me in deciding to not do something I am more than capable of doing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give into the thoughts of “I will have more time to do this later” as a reason and justification for the resistance to doing what is necessary in the moment as taking care of school work and studying

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give into the thoughts of “I don’t have enough time now – it’s too late” as a reason and justification to not walk through the resistance to school work I have created to thinking it will take to much time, instead of stopping, breathing and pushing through to complete that which I have made a commitment to

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe there is a ‘later time’ to get things done, instead of realizing this is another justification and excuse I use to not have to do that which I have committed to do and is necessary to be done as doing school work/studying

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be ‘perfect’ in taking care of all the responsibilities I have allowed to accumulate to a lot of things I need to take care of within the ideas in my mind as an image of be doing all the stuff in one day, doing everything and within this feel accomplished as if I did something well, instead of realizing this is all within my mind and a game I am playing with myself instead of ACTUALLY living

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, when having accumulated things to take care of, in moments of not pushing through a resistance, and thus allowed myself to put it off for another moment/later time go into the character of “I will get ALL of this done on this day” wherein I go into my mind and make a list of all the things I will be able to do on a more suitable day where I am not having to run around the city to work or school and thus believe I will then get all the stuff I have accumulated done, and within this creating an energetic experience of myself of “feeling good” wherein I give myself approval for telling myself I will do all this stuff and then feel good about the idea of doing all this stuff – when in reality I have not physically lived it and thus proving that the mental reality is an illusion that has no impact on physical reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to create an energetic experience of positivity within myself when I tell myself I will do all the things I have put off for a later time, instead of investigating the game I am playing with myself, wherein I do not live the commitments I have made, and instead feed off of the energy I create in the mind with the illusion reality that I will do all these things

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to validate the illusionary reality of the mind wherein I think and believe that I will be able to do all the things I have put off for a later moment/time within feelings of ‘being good’, wherein I do not question the reason as to why I am in the situation of having to get done things I Have put off and so investigating the postponement character wherein I will tell myself I have more time later to do something that is currently in my reality

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, when believing the voices as thoughts in my head that I tell myself I will do all the things I have put off for later times/moments, and then not do them, allow myself to go into the opposite polarity that was expected, intended within myself of feeling shitty and then judge myself for not doing what I told myself I would do – instead of stopping myself before this whole polarity playout could even begin – by not accepting and allowing myself to give into to the postponement character that I participated within, telling myself I can ‘do this later’

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to, in the moment of facing a resistance, accept the thoughts within my mind such as, “I’m too tired to do this, it’s too late, I will do this tomorrow… I have more time on this other day, I will get it all done”, instead of realizing that this is deliberate self sabotage to not be responsible for myself and the commitments I made and thus I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to allow my thoughts as the postponement character direct me in deciding to not do something I am more than capable of doing

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give into the thoughts of “I will have more time to do this later” as a reason and justification for the resistance to doing what is necessary in the moment as taking care of school work and studying

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to give into the thoughts of “I don’t have enough time now – it’s too late” as a reason and justification to not walk through the resistance to school work I have created to thinking it will take to much time, instead of stopping, breathing and pushing through to complete that which I have made a commitment to

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to believe there is a ‘later time’ to get things done, instead of realizing this is another justification and excuse I use to not have to do that which I have committed to do and is necessary to be done as doing school work/studying

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to desire to be ‘perfect’ in taking care of all the responsibilities I have allowed to accumulate to a lot of things I need to take care of within the ideas in my mind as an image of be doing all the stuff in one day, doing everything and within this feel accomplished as if I did something well, instead of realizing this is all within my mind and a game I am playing with myself instead of ACTUALLY living

I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to validate my minds reality of me doing things that are required to get done instead of seeing and investigate the REAL reality where I am not living up to the mental reality, where I then create conflict within myself as the physical reality is not matching to the internal mind reality and thus create friction within the positive and negative feeling I generate within this whole scenario of putting things off, and then telling myself I will do it all, and then not doing it all and thus then feeling shitty about myself, instead of realizing this while play out within myself was unnecessary and could have been stopping in one moment – through/as breath

When and as I see myself going into thoughts of telling myself that I will have more time another day to do what I am currently faced with as a responsibility in my day, I stop and I breathe and look within myself in self honesty to see the starting point of wanting to make the decision and check to make sure it is not within deliberate self running away and trying to avoid the responsibility, as I see/realize/understand the whole playout I will create for myself as the polarity game of the mind, and thus I stop and I breathe and ensure I am clear within the decision and if I am not, I commit myself to forgive myself for the resistance I am allowing within myself and proceed to complete the responsibility I am faced with, such as studying and school work

I commit myself to stop resistances within myself towards school work and studying and all things in general as the responsibility and commitments I have in my day to day living, realizing I am the creator of the resistance and thus able to stop it’s creation and manifestation in one breath

I commit myself to investigate the forces that direct me as thoughts, feelings and emotions throughout my day to stop myself from existing as an organic robot that follows thoughts feeling and emotions, and instead commit myself to breathe and live and decide for myself within self honesty how I will live

I commit myself to stopping the postponement character as I see/realize/understand the self dishonesty it is and thus the manifested consequences it creates

I commit myself to take responsibility for all the commitments I have made in my life, to ensure I am giving equal consideration to all points in my life to ensure that I do not put anything off for later time and deal with what is here in each moment I am able

I commit myself to stop allowing thoughts feelings and emotions to direct me

I commit myself to breath in moments of facing resistance

I commit myself to stop feeding myself with positive feelings of energy within my mind where I allow thoughts and ideas about how I will live make me feel good, instead of simply LIVING it for real, in/as this physical reality

I commit myself to stop living in the mind as the lie and start living in reality as self honesty I forgive myself that I have accepted and allowed myself to validate my minds reality of me doing things that are required to get done instead of seeing and investigate the REAL reality where I am not living up to the mental reality, where I then create conflict within myself as the physical reality is not matching to the internal mind reality and thus create friction within the positive and negative feeling I generate within this whole scenario of putting things off, and then telling myself I will do it all, and then not doing it all and thus then feeling shitty about myself, instead of realizing this while play out within myself was unnecessary and could have been stopping in one moment – through/as breath

When and as I see myself going into thoughts of telling myself that I will have more time another day to do what I am currently faced with as a responsibility in my day, I stop and I breathe and look within myself in self honesty to see the starting point of wanting to make the decision and check to make sure it is not within deliberate self running away and trying to avoid the responsibility, as I see/realize/understand the whole playout I will create for myself as the polarity game of the mind, and thus I stop and I breathe and ensure I am clear within the decision and if I am not, I commit myself to forgive myself for the resistance I am allowing within myself and proceed to complete the responsibility I am faced with, such as studying and school work

I commit myself to stop resistances within myself towards school work and studying and all things in general as the responsibility and commitments I have in my day to day living, realizing I am the creator of the resistance and thus able to stop it’s creation and manifestation in one breath

I commit myself to investigate the forces that direct me as thoughts, feelings and emotions throughout my day to stop myself from existing as an organic robot that follows thoughts feeling and emotions, and instead commit myself to breathe and live and decide for myself within self honesty how I will live

I commit myself to stopping the postponement character as I see/realize/understand the self dishonesty it is and thus the manifested consequences it creates

I commit myself to take responsibility for all the commitments I have made in my life, to ensure I am giving equal consideration to all points in my life to ensure that I do not put anything off for later time and deal with what is here in each moment I am able

I commit myself to stop allowing thoughts feelings and emotions to direct me

I commit myself to breath in moments of facing resistance

I commit myself to stop feeding myself with positive feelings of energy within my mind where I allow thoughts and ideas about how I will live make me feel good, instead of simply LIVING it for real, in/as this physical reality

I commit myself to stop living in the mind as the lie and start living in reality as self honesty

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